Can I Say I Love You
by jenmer61977
Summary: After My Two Mommies and Natalia leaving after setting Ms. Jennings straight to go out with Frank. Natalia tries to figure out what she is feeling. Will she continue to run to Frank or will she own up to what she is feeling? Will Olivia? Or will they keep pushing their hearts away?
1. Chapter 1

**Can I Say I love You**

 **Summary: After My Two Mommies and Natalia leaving after setting Ms. Jennings straight to go out with Frank. Natalia tries to figure out what she is feeling. Will she continue to run to Frank or will she own up to what she is feeling? Will Olivia? Or will they keep pushing their hearts away?** **  
** **Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and I do not make any profit from this.**

 **A/N: So I was sitting her trying to write for my other stories and the new ones I have had rolling around in my head for a while would not let me be. My fairy will not let it go and let me continue the others so here is the first chapter of the first of my new set of ramblings. I hope you guys enjoy it.**

 **Chapter 1**

Natalia sat in her car outside of the farmhouse just thinking. She had just come home from her date with Frank and was not sure what she was feeling. She reviewed the events of the day and tried to make sense of all of it. Emma's report set off a chain of events she wasn't sure how to deal with. Contrary to popular belief she was not that naive. She knew what the looks the parents were giving them meant. She just didn't care at the time. Emma was telling them all how much she loved her family and calling her mom. She was over the moon.

Once the presentation was over she really didn't mean to throw Olivia under the bus. She had to see about trying to get Rafe moved to Cedars and needed to check on him. She didn't have time to really think about it all until the drive home. She didn't know what to say when Olivia wanted to talk about what happened. She still didn't know how she felt about it. Of course she loved Olivia. She had for quite some time. She just didn't want to think about how she loved her. They had been getting closer for a while now and once she and Emma moved in they just fell into a routine and became a family.

New Year's was when she first acknowledged her feelings to herself. After she left and went to Towers she realized that there was nowhere she would rather be then with Emma and Olivia. When she came in and found them sleeping on the couch all she wanted to do was walk over and awaken Olivia by kissing her softly until she stirred. The thought shocked her and she pushed it aside.

After weeks of just living she realized that she felt so much more than friendship for Olivia and it scared her. She had never had a friend like Olivia, someone that was always there for her and that she was always there for in return. There was no way that Olivia felt the same for her and she was terrified that she would do something that ruined their friendship.

She spent all her time trying to sensor herself and to not show any outward signs that she felt more. It was hard when at night Emma would want her in the middle during their movie or when Olivia stumbled down the stairs looking so adorable in the morning before her first cup of coffee. Natalia thanked her lucky stars that Olivia was oblivious in the mornings and never noticed her staring, lovingly she was sure, while she woke up.

She spent the last month during her free time at church praying. She took great stock in god and his teachings. Her faith is all she had sometimes and it got her through the hardest times in her life. She knew she didn't agree with all of the teachings of the church. If she had she wouldn't have kept her son. She knew the churches standing and Father Ray had made his own views clear in his sermon a few weeks ago. She just didn't agree with it.

Two of her best friends and biggest life savers when they lived in Chicago was a lesbian couple who lived next door. They owned a café and gave her a job and a couch to sleep on when she was pregnant with Rafe and had nowhere to go. They were like parents to her helping her babysit or buying diapers, always helping in some way. Rafe even called them Nana and Grammy.

No, she didn't need to reconcile anything where the church was concerned. Her problem was Olivia was straight, her best friend and so out of her league it was not funny in the least little bit. She didn't understand because god gave her this big love and she didn't know what to do with it. Even if Olivia did swing that way Natalia was sure she'd be the last woman on her mind, but, then she kissed her and now she didn't know what to do.

She knew Olivia cared for her, it was obvious in the way they interacted but she had thought it was just too big of a longshot that she would ever return romantic feelings. That kiss felt too real not to be but she was scared and Olivia back pedaled and she just didn't know. She insisted they go back to the school and set the record straight because she was sure that Olivia was going to be upset. She already looked so agitated about the whole thing, but Olivia looked so upset by what she was saying to the teacher that she had to back pedal herself and fixing what she was saying.

She knew exactly what Olivia was talking about when she was trying to get her to understand what the other parents were thinking. Natalia almost laughed out loud at the Jane Jane reference, but she wanted to just not talk about it so she played dumb. She needed more time to think about it but then Olivia's lips were pressed to her and she stopped thinking, she stopped breathing. She panicked, she knows she did and now everything was just so messed up.

She left the date with Frank before it really started. After kissing him she knew that she shouldn't be there. She never should have showed up in the first place. Frank was a good man and he deserved someone who wanted to be with him and that was not her. She had tried to talk to him and make him understand but he just smiled with that stupid puppy dog look and said they would go slower and it would be ok. She politely told him she just wanted to be friends and left quickly. She didn't belong there she belonged at home with Olivia.

Now here she sat, in the cold, afraid to walk into her own home and face the woman she knew she needed to talk to.

Olivia was in a similar state in the house. She had spent the better part of the evening berating herself about how she handled the whole situation. She should have known that Natalia wouldn't understand what the others were thinking. She should have just kept her damn mouth shut and her lips to herself. She blamed the alcohol, it made her do it. She had been sitting in Towers drinking her martini minding her own business trying to figure out what to do about Emma's presentation. It was so sweet and Olivia loved that she felt that way about Natalia. She knew that she could count on Natalia to always be there for Emma no matter what and didn't mind her thinking of her as a second parent.

She was just about to order another drink when that guy spoke to her and she realized that she just wanted to be home with Natalia. So went home and just sat in the chair waiting on Natalia to return. When she came in she was just so pretty standing there and she started talking out of her ass about Frank and her eyes and smile. Yep, it was the damn martinis fault. She didn't know half of that she was saying then in a fit of stupidity she thought it would be a good idea to demonstrate.

That sobered her up in an instant. The feel of Natalia's lips on her own was heaven and she didn't want to ever stop. She could have sworn that Natalia started kissing her back before she pushed her away. When Natalia had asked her why she kissed her all she wanted to do was tell her everything. She wanted to tell her how much Christmas with her had meant to her and when she came back to spend New Year's Eve with her and Emma how much she loved that Natalia had chosen their family over extra work.

All she wanted to do was tell her how much she loved her and kiss her again but she was scared. Natalia didn't react well to the kiss and to be honest neither did Olivia. It was all so confusing and scary. She loved her so much but the thought of losing her, losing the one person that meant as much to her as her children did was terrifying. The only thing more terrifying that day was earlier when Rafe had gotten sick. She had been beside herself with worry and was grateful that Emma understood and sent them to him.

She didn't do well when any of her kids were sick and that was so dangerous for him. She wasn't sure when she started thinking of him as hers but he was. She was currently doing all she could behind the scenes to help him. She wanted him home and safe and she would do whatever was necessary to make it happen. She knew she was in deep shit when Natalia found out but that couldn't be helped. That prison was not doing what they were supposed to for an inmate with his medical problems and she was determined to get him home because of it.

It didn't help matters when she noticed Natalia's headlights as she came home from meeting with Frank. Something must have happened because she was home too early for them to have even had drinks. That was thirty minutes ago and she was starting to wonder if Natalia was ever going to come in. She made a pot of coffee, sure that she would be cold when she came in and now she just sat here waiting at the table for her.

She knew they needed to talk but she didn't know how to start that conversation or what to say. She felt like there were so many mixed signals being shot off by both of them she didn't know which way was up. She never thought Natalia could love her too. Her faith, her son, her church and all these things were important to Natalia. If she didn't figure out how to fix this she could lose everything. Her home, her son, her best friend, the family they had made together and she knew she would survive it. She needed it all.

She was brought out of her inner musings when the door opened and Natalia came through. "Hi."

Olivia smiled slightly, "Hey."

They just stared at each other thinking the same thing, 'now what.'

 **A/N: Ok that was chapter 1. What do you think, is it a keeper?**


	2. Chapter 2

**Can I Say I love You**

 **Summary: After My Two Mommies and Natalia leaving after setting Ms. Jennings straight to go out with Frank. Natalia tries to figure out what she is feeling. Will she continue to run to Frank or will she own up to what she is feeling? Will Olivia? Or will they keep pushing their hearts away?** **  
** **Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and I do not make any profit from this.**

 **Chapter 2**

 _She was brought out of her inner musings when the door opened and Natalia came through. "Hi."_

 _Olivia smiled slightly, "Hey."_

 _They just stared at each other thinking the same thing, 'now what.'_

Natalia moved and broke eye contact first hanging her coat and purse. Olivia stood and took the leftovers she had been pushing around the box and threw them away. "How was your date with Frank?"

Natalia shrugged. "It wasn't. I realized almost immediately that I didn't belong there with him. It wasn't right so told him we could only be friends and I came home to you."

Olivia looked up sharply not expecting that answer. "Oh, well, you know Frankie's a good man. He'd treat you right."

Natalia shook her head walking toward her. "He's not what I want and it wouldn't be right for me to lead him on. He kissed me and it felt so wrong. I just couldn't stay there after that."

If it was possible Olivia's eyes turned a deeper green and flashed before she calmed herself at hearing that Frank's lips had touched Natalia. "Well, you have to do what's right for you, whatever makes you happy." She moved away and sat back down picking up her water taking a drink.

Natalia sighed when she sat back down and went to the fridge to grab a bottle of water for herself. "I saw you didn't eat any of the food you just threw away. Would you like me to fix you something?"

Olivia just shook her head. "I'm really not hungry."

Natalia started putting up the dry dishes in the rack and avoided eye contact. "What time are we supposed to pick up Emma tomorrow? She's staying at Jody's tonight right?"

Olivia nodded. "Yes, they are supposed to drop her off around 6:00. They're going to the circus tomorrow."

"That'll be fun." She put the last glass up, closed the cabinet and turned back to Olivia. "Did you get her extra clothes or do we need to take her some in the morning?"

"They came by a little bit ago and she grabbed what she needed. She told me to tell you she loves you and goodnight."

Natalia smile at the thoughtfulness of their daughter. "I'm sorry I missed her." She grabbed her water and sat at the table with Olivia.

They sat in silence for a while until Olivia couldn't stand it anymore. "Look, we need to talk about this. I'm sorry I upset you and kissed you earlier. You're my best friend and we shouldn't have all this awkwardness between us. I'm sorry the thought of being with me that way is so horrible to you but we can just pretend none of it happened and go back to just being us, please I hate this."

Natalia move toward her kneeling in front of her. "We do need to talk. The thought of being with you that way is not horrible to me. Please don't think that. I'm sorry I over reacted to the whole thing. We should have been able to sit down and discuss this without it turning in to the mess it did."

Olivia sighed and rested their foreheads together. "I hate fighting with you. I thought everything was ok when we left the school but you were still acting funny and then you left."

Natalia stood pulling her up and led her to the couch in the living room. "I'm sorry I left like that. I should have stayed and worked this out with you. I don't like fighting with you either."

Olivia smiled as they snuggled together like always finally feeling a sense of normalcy. "It's ok but can we please just talk or something next time that really scared me. I can't lose you Nat. You, our children, our home, I need it."

Her breath caught and Natalia pulled her closer holding on tight. "I promise to talk from now on and not to run. It was a huge mistake to leave tonight. You're not going to lose anything Olivia. This right here, us, our family, I need it too. You're ok, we're ok."

They sighed snuggled in together, neither saying more both too scared to. After a while Olivia's breathing evened out and Natalia looked down at her face smiling indulgently. Grabbing the blanket off the back of the couch she covered them and just held on. She was content to hold her and watch her sleep for a while.

The next morning when she woke she realized that they had slept there all night and at some point they shifted and were now fully lying on curled together. She couldn't move because Olivia was mostly using her as a body pillow, not that she was complaining but it made it impossible to get up without waking her and she needed her rest. She closed her eyes and did what she hardly ever did and fell back asleep loving the feel of Olivia against her.

An hour later Olivia awoke feeling a little fuzzy. She stretched and realized two things. One, she didn't smell coffee or food like normal and two; she was definitely laying on something. She opened her eyes a bit realizing she was laying on someone, Natalia. She smiled sleepily closing her eyes. She'd gladly give up morning coffee for this. They must have fallen asleep after talking last night and Olivia was enjoying the closeness.

As she snuggled back in she started thinking maybe she should get up. She didn't want Natalia to wake up and freak out but she didn't want to move yet either. She may not get an opportunity again to be with her like this and she wanted to savor it. She was so caught up in her inner musings that she failed to notice that Natalia's breathing changed and she was now awake so she was startled when she spoke.

"You're thinking to loud. How's a woman supposed to sleep with all that noise?" She chuckled and tightened her arms.

Olivia sighed at the feeling of not being pushed away and looked up. "I was just thinking about how lumpy this couch is and the lack of coffee aroma in the house this morning."

Natalia laughed at this. "Well, I did wake up earlier and was going to make some but I was a little trapped here. Must be the human blanket I found."

Olivia was laughing now too and nuzzled her neck once more before getting up and helping her sit. Natalia folded the blanket and stood. "I'm going to go and start breakfast. Is there anything special you want this morning?"

Olivia shook her head. "No, I was just kidding. You don't have to make anything if you don't want to."

Natalia cupped her cheek and smile. "I like cooking for you, now go up and do your morning thing and I will get it started."

Olivia nodded and headed upstairs. Natalia went to the kitchen and started the coffee pot before pulling out the stuff for muffins. Once she got them mixed and in the oven she headed upstairs herself to shower and change quickly while they were cooking.

She came back down a little bit later to find Olivia standing at the sink looking out the window looking thoughtful drinking a cup of coffee. Moving up beside her she bumped their shoulders together. "You look awfully lost in thought there, everything ok?"

Olivia chuckled and looked at her. "Everything is fine. I was just thinking it looks like it's going to be a beautiful day. I was wondering if you wanted to go shopping with me and maybe for a walk in the park later since Emma won't be home until late?"

Natalia thought for a moment before smiling. "Sounds good but I need to run to the prison for an hour to check on Rafe then I'm free."

Olivia rubbed a hand up her arm as she moved past her and sat at the table. "After breakfast we can head to the prison then go to the mall. I want to see him too, he really scared me yesterday."

Natalia moved to pull the muffins out of the oven as the timer went off. She plated them, grabbed her coffee cup and sat with Olivia to eat. "I know what you mean. I hate to see him like that."

They sat and ate their muffins talking like always easily moving into their usual banter like yesterday never happened.

As Natalia stood to clear the table Olivia's phone rang. After she answered it her face changed from relaxed and happy to terrified and agitated so fast it scared Natalia. "What do you mean it happened again? Where is he now?"

She stood grabbing Natalia and pulling her toward their coats. "Ok, were on our way. Tell him we are coming and so help me god they better let us in to see him."

She hung up the phone as she was putting her coat on Natalia following suit not sure what was happening. "That was Rick. After you told me Frank wasn't doing anything to help Rafe I made some calls. He went to check on him last night and this morning. He's transferred him to Cedars because she had another episode this morning."

Natalia gasped and hurried to grab her phone and purse. "Dear god how did that happen if he was in the infirmary already. They should have been monitoring him."

Olivia scoffed as she pulled her out the door and locked it. "That's what I want to know. I'll have someone's head for this."

They got in the car, Olivia driving, and headed to Cedars. When they arrived they rushed in and Rick pulled them aside into a small room. "Hey, he's ok now but this shouldn't have happened. He was fine when I went to check on him last night. When I got there this morning her was zoned out so I took his sugar and he was dangerously low."

Natalia put a hand on his arm interrupting him, "How low Rick?"

He just shook his head sadly. "42" they both gasped and he continued. "After I got him regulated and here he told me that no one had been in to see him at all after I left. He started feeling bad early this morning before I got there and called for help but no one came. They should have been checking him every 3 hours for 24 hours, that's the set up there for this kind of thing and they weren't."

Olivia pulled out her phone, "I need you to fax a report about what happened to Mel for me Rick and we need to get in there to see him."

Rick nodded. "Let me see what I can do. You're not supposed to be in there with a prisoner." At Olivia's glare he held up his hands. "But I'm going to find a way then I'll write it up and send it off to Mel. Wait here." They nodded and he headed out.

Olivia pressed a speed dial button and paced as the waited. "Mel… It's Olivia… we have a problem with Rafe…"

As she continued to tell her all that had happened with him since the day before Natalia just stared not sure what was happening. She was terrified for Rafe and needed to see him before she lost it and Olivia was yelling into her phone, outraged by all of it as well.

When she hung up the phone she walked over and pulled Natalia into a hug. "I swear to you I will have him out of there as soon as I can."

Natalia looked up into her eyes. "What did you do Olivia?"

Olivia sighed, "I hired Mel after your last lawyer told you there was nothing they could do. She's been working on getting him off on a medical deal because of good behavior and his record while he's been in. This should be that last bit we need to sway a judge to releasing him even if it's to a halfway house for the remainder of his sentence."

Natalia just stared at her in shock. She had no idea Olivia had been working to help Rafe. "How… why… I don't understand. I know how much Mel charges for business things this is probably costing a fortune. I can't pay for this Liv."

Olivia took her face in her hands. "I'm paying for this. He needs out of that hell hole before they kill him and I'm not going to stand by when I can prevent it from happening. I love him and we need him home now."

She spoke with such conviction it took Natalia's breath away. "Ok, but we will talk about me paying at least part of it back."

Olivia shrugged, "Fine but I got your retainer back from that hack that did nothing and used it to pay Mel so you've already paid her some, the rest we will discuss later. Right now all I care about is getting our son home."

Natalia nodded and buried herself back into her embrace trying to calm her fears. Rick came in a few minutes later and they looked up from their hold of each other. "I got you 15 minutes with him, let's go."

They rushed him and followed him out the door. "He's still a little loopy so he's really free with his words right now."

They nodded and entered the room when he opened the door. Rafe swung his head to the door and smile brightly. "Ma, Hi!" He turned his head to Olivia. "Liiiiiivvvviiia! Did you come to take me home? I miss my munchkin and the jail people are mean."

Olivia chuckled and took his hand. "I'm working on if honey. Just give me a little more time."

He nodded and looked back to his mother. "She's awesome ma. She's gonna bring me home so I can hug you and my munchkin aaallllll the time."

Natalia smiled with tears in her eyes. "I know mijo she told me."

He looked scandalized. "OOOhh that was a secret." He looked back to Olivia panicked. "Who busted you Liv?"

Olivia patted his chest lovingly. "No one did honey. I told her myself, it was time for her to know."

He deflated and lay back. "Oh good," at that he closed his eyes and fell asleep.

Rick smiled sadly. "I'm sorry but your time is up and you have to leave now."

They sighed and both kissed his forehead before leaving with Rick. He took them back to the room they had been in before. "You can hang here until I can get you in again to see him. The coffee in this room is slightly better than the waiting room."

As he left Olivia turned to Natalia to find her very upset and agitated looking at her sternly. "You have some explaining to do Missy."

 **A/N: Chapter two down. I'm working on Chapter two to My Heart in Your Hands now but after this I'm aiming for once a week for updates on all stories. More in I have the time and my fairy is out to play. Hope you liked this.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Can I Say I love You**

 **Summary: After My Two Mommies and Natalia leaving after setting Ms. Jennings straight to go out with Frank. Natalia tries to figure out what she is feeling. Will she continue to run to Frank or will she own up to what she is feeling? Will Olivia? Or will they keep pushing their hearts away?** **  
** **Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and I do not make any profit from this.**

 **Chapter 3**

 _As he left Olivia turned to Natalia to find her very upset and agitated looking at her sternly. "You have some explaining to do Missy."_

Olivia held up her hands in surrender. "Ok, scary Natalia, what's wrong?"

Natalia shook her head. "What's wrong? What's wrong is you've been going behind my back and had him lying to me. You've been keeping secrets from me, spending money I can't pay back and I can't even be too mad because we need him home. You've obviously started a relationship with him outside of our interactions together with him too, which I'm ok with but I'm just so upset with you for this Olivia." She said it all in a rush and tried to calm herself.

Olivia sighed. "I wasn't trying to upset you Nat. I just wanted to help him." She moved closer but didn't touch her afraid of upsetting her further. "I couldn't just sit by and watch as those bastards keep letting this happen. They're going to kill him honey."

Natalia sobbed fell into her arms. "I know that's why I can't be mad but you know I hate secrecy and lies."

Olivia pulled her closer. "I know and I'm sorry. I was afraid to tell you what I did. I promise no more secrets."

She sighed into her chest. "Ok just don't lie to me or have the kids lie to me. It hurts me."

"I promise I'm so sorry I upset you like this. I should have told you."

Olivia moved them to the couch and sat pulled Natalia down with her. Natalia was practically in her lap as her breathing evened out she fell into a mentally exhausted sleep. Olivia just held her close leaned back and sent off text messages to Mel and made a few quiet phone calls. Once she finished with her messages and calls she shifted bringing Natalia fully into her lap and settled to watch the TV waiting for them to see Rafe again.

She was half dozing herself when the door flung open and Frank strode in. "Natalia."

Natalia startled awake and Olivia cursed under her breath. She was hoping she would sleep a bit longer. "Jeez Frank she was sleeping."

He stopped in front of them looking like a puppy that just got his nosed wacked. "I'm sorry I just came to check on how you were doing Natalia. Are you ok, do you need anything?"

They both look at him incredulously. "Rafe is in the hospital, how do you think I am? You should be asking how he is not me."

She shook her head and buried it into Olivia's neck and whispered to her. "I can't deal with him right now, please Liv."

Olivia shifted pulling her closer. "Look Frank now is not the time. We're just waiting to get to see him again and Natalia really needs some rest."

He squared his shoulders getting angry. "What is wrong with you Olivia? I just want to help if I can. I'm her boyfriend for god sakes."

Natalia sighed into her before she pealed herself off and stood. "Listen; first off don't use the lord's name that way. I don't like it. Secondly you are not my boyfriend and if you don't back off you won't even be my friend. I tried to get your help yesterday and your idea of helping me is to kiss me. I told you last night that I don't like you that way so please just leave."

He moved forward to protest but Olivia pulled her back to her. "She asked you to leave. I think that would be a good idea Frank."

He looked back and forth between them and stormed out the door. Natalia deflated and melted into her. "How many ways can you tell someone you are not interested? This just proves I never should have gone last night. Ugh he's so frustrating!"

Olivia pulled her in. "Hey, hey calm down Nat he's gone. Everything is fine."

Natalia sighed into her taking a deep breath. "Thank you I just can't handle anything else right now."

She kissed her head and squeezed her tighter. "That's what you have me for. You just try and stay calm and I'll handle the details."

Before anymore could be said Rick came in. "Hey ladies, I got you another visit if you're interested."

They grabbed their purses and were at the door quickly following Rick back to their boy. It had been a few hours and they didn't know what state they would find him in.

When they entered the room they found him sitting up eating a buzz burger. "Hey Ma, I got two more for you guys. Buzz had them brought over."

They sighed in relief seeing him acting normal. "Thank you mijo I think we will." She looked to Rick. "Do we have time?"

Rick smiled. "Yep, I talked them into letting you eat lunch with him and stay since it is technically its visitor's day and they found out Olivia was here and they are a little scared of you."

Natalia looked at her confused and Olivia and Rafe chuckled. "The last time I was up there with Mel I may have had a little talk with a few of the guards."

Rafe scoffed. "A little talk? They had a come to Jesus with her and by the time she was done they looked like they messed themselves."

Natalia narrowed her eyes. "Why?"

Olivia shrugged. "I had left some extra money there for him and some of those sugar free candies he likes and he didn't get either. The bigger problem was when I asked them about it was they started hitting on me like really hard core so I threatened a lawsuit for sexual harassment and theft since they were stupid enough to do it in front of my lawyer and the cameras. Needless to say I got his money back they found his candy and now they are afraid to look at me."

Rafe was laughing but Natalia looked pissed. "Are the guards that did this here?"

Rafe noticed the look on his ma's face. "Um, I don't know but its ok Ma."

She shook her head and Olivia finally caught on to the storm brewing and took her hands. "Hey, it's fine. I took care of it. Mel is using it against them to help us with Rafe."

Natalia calmed slightly at her touch. "Fine but if something like that happens again…"

Olivia smiled softly. "I'll tell you and let you have at them."

Natalia nodded and they turned to Rafe and lunch. They talked and ate until Olivia's phone started ringing. She looked down at the ringer then ran a hand through Rafe's hair as she stood. "I need to take this I'll be back in a moment."

She shared a smile with Natalia and walked out. She had put a call in to the governor while Natalia was napping and he was finally getting back with her. "Hello… yes governor it is the weekend and if you had listened to your voicemail you would know that I am at the hospital with my Rafe after your prison once again failed him."

She spent the next few minutes going over what all had happened and sighed in frustrations when he spouted off the budget for the prisons and a bunch of crap and Olivia 1.0 was now out to play. "Listen, I don't give a rat's ass about your budgets or whatever shit you are spouting. I care that my son was in the infirmary for the 5th time in the last two weeks because they are withholding his meds when he asks for them. This is not ok and now not only did they not give them to him, once he was in the infirmary they didn't properly treat him and if an outside doctor hadn't come in to check on him this morning when he did my son would be in a god damn coma right now or dead!"

She was so pissed her heart was beating out of her chest and she was sure that her pacemaker alarm would be going off soon. A moment later she felt a hand on her lower back and calmed instantly, Natalia. "Fine but you are going to do something about this or I swear to god that I will go to the press. Dinah Marler is a personal friend of mine and will no doubt love to run the story of how one of your prisons almost killed my son by withholding meds and you didn't do anything to stop it. I'll also run the lawsuit I have against your guards for sexual harassment that I have on tape curtesy of them having video and audio recordings for every visit and the fact that my lawyer and son were present during. I'll turn that over to her as well if I need to but damn it something is going to happen very soon or I will have your ass and you know I am more than capable of burying you."

She paused listening and leaned into Natalia who was now hugging her from behind. "OK, you have to the end of business Monday to have something done or I talk to WSPR… Ok talk to you them."

She hung up the phone and took a deep breath. "I know I own the swear jar my next paycheck but that man infuriates me sometimes."

Natalia smiled. "I think I can let it slip this once because it was for one of the kids but don't make a habit out of it."

Olivia chuckled. "Na I'll pay it. If it helps Rafe it was well worth the 60 bucks I now own that thing."

Natalia giggles. "80 but who's counting."

The both laughed and Olivia turned in her arms and hugged her tight for a moment. "I need to call Mel then I'll be back in. I promise I'll stay calm."

Natalia gave her a look that said you better then smiled and went back in with Rafe. Olivia watched her go then dialed Mel to let her know about the conversation she had just had with the governor. They talked for a few more minutes then she hung up and made her way back to the room.

Rafe smirked as she entered, "Well hello there mad dog. How's the blood pressure?"

She slapped his leg playfully. "Shut up you. You should be paying attention and taking notes."

He chuckled and took her hand. "Oh I do, I hang on every word. You should see my cell it's littered with notes from all our interactions. I even have some from the first time you visited me in jail being what was it ma? Gentle as a lamb? Yep, I absorb it all."

Olivia slapped him again. "Watch it boy, if I get my way you have to come home with me."

His face turned from playful to wistful. "That sounds like heaven to me."

Olivia just smiled running a hand through his hair before sitting on the couch and laying her head back closing her eyes.

Natalia smile watching them banter back and forth and got up when she sat grabbing her purse. She took out a pill box of meds taking it and a bottle of water to her.

Olivia opened her eyes and sat up with a smile when she nudged her and handed her the meds. "Thank you."

Natalia just squeezed her shoulder taking back the pill box as she sat next to her. They all just rested then and watched a Law and Order marathon together to pass the time.

A while later Rick came in to check on him. "He's looking good but I'm keeping him over night and possibly until Monday for observation." Natalia started to get worried about how long they wanted to keep him but Rick caught her eye and winked letting her know it was ok.

He took another finger prick and gave him a shot of insulin. "He should be good for a while but it's time for you guys to head out. It's 5 and they are saying he gets no more visitors today. Come back at 9:00 tomorrow morning and I'll get you back in as soon as I can."

They stood and walked over to kiss his head. "Emma with be home in an hour anyway. I just hate to leave."

Olivia rubbed her back. "He's ok here and I'm sure Rick will keep an eye out. I'll bring you back first thing in the morning." She turned to Rick. "Can we bring Emma tomorrow?"

Rafe's eyes lit up but Rick sighed and shook his head. "No, I was barely able to talk them into you two. If you have a minor with you they are not going to let you in at all. But I plan on staying in the hospital all night in case I am needed."

They just nodded telling him thank you and saying goodbye and headed out. Natalia looked longing at the door and Olivia pulled her close. "He's going to be ok. We'll be back before you know it. Let's go get some take out and head home to wait for Emma."

Natalia sighed leaning into her and they headed out for the night.

 **A/N: Ok let me know what you think of how things are going. Have a wonderful day my lovelies.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Can I Say I love You**

 **Summary: After My Two Mommies and Natalia leaving after setting Ms. Jennings straight to go out with Frank. Natalia tries to figure out what she is feeling. Will she continue to run to Frank or will she own up to what she is feeling? Will Olivia? Or will they keep pushing their hearts away?** **  
** **Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and I do not make any profit from this.**

 **Chapter 4**

They decided to stop at Company and pick up some of Buzz's tuna noddle casserole before heading home. When they walked in they spotted Frank as he came out of the back. He waved franticly and made a beeline for them. Natalia groaned and buried her face in Olivia's shoulder.

Olivia chuckled and whispered in her ear. "He's like a stray dog that you feed out of pity and it never leaves trying to follow you everywhere."

Natalia giggled and slapped her playfully. "Stop it," and turned to Frank as he stopped in front of them.

Frank had that goofy smile on his face and if she could have gotten away with it Olivia would have commented on how he was bouncing in place like a puppy wanting a treat. "Hey Natalia, how are you? What do you need? Can I help you with something?"

She sighed and looked to Olivia, who tried not to laugh at her reaction to him, to answer. "We're just picking up an order we called in to Buzz before we go to meet up with Emma."

Frank frowned irritated at her and looked back to Natalia. "Well I can take you back to the hospital to sit with Rafe so she can go get her own kid and you can be with yours. She shouldn't take you away from your son. He's sick for heaven sakes."

The more he spoke the redder Natalia's face turned in anger. "She isn't taking me away from _our_ son. We aren't allowed to see him again before tomorrow so we are going to pick up _our_ daughter and have dinner in _our_ home. Now if you would be so kind as to let Buzz know we are here for _our_ dinner we will be on our way."

Olivia turned her head to keep from laughing out loud at the look on his face. "Natalia I… I think we need to talk."

She just shook her head. "I don't have anything else to say to you Frank nor do I have the time to try and get it through your thick head that I'm not interested in you as anything other than a friend. Emma will be home soon and we need to go. I said all I had to say last night and in the hospital today."

He started to talk again and she sighed burying her face in Olivia's shoulder getting frustrated. Olivia wrapped an arm around her pulling her close her smile falling completely. "Look Frankie, she said she doesn't want to talk so just let us by so we can get our food."

Frank went from upset and confused to pissed in a heartbeat. "You need to stay out of this. It's between me and Natalia. It's none of your business."

Olivia stepped forward. "Anything that upsets her is my business. You not leaving her alone after she told you she's not interested is upsetting her so it's my business. _You_ need to back of before we slap a restraining order on an upstanding police officer for harassment."

Frank was seeing red and stepped forward only to be pulled back as Buzz grabbed him and Natalia pulled Olivia back. "Frank what the HELL is wrong with you? Leave them alone."

Frank threw his hands up and stormed back into the kitchen. Buzz sighed as he watched him go. "I'm sorry about that I have no idea what has gotten in to him."

Olivia shook her head. "What's gotten into him is he wants to date Natalia and she said no. He keeps pushing and if he's not careful he will have a restraining order in his police jacket. Just a warning for you, talk some sense into him before he screws himself. I won't stand for her being harassed this way every time she turns around."

Buzz looked to Natalia who was nodding along. "I have no interest at all in him other than friendship and he is about to lose that. Please talk to him."

Buzz sighed and nodded. "I will and I am so sorry for how he is acting. I tried to push him to pursue you and I feel awful that he has taken it this far."

Natalia rubbed his arm. "Don't do that, it's not your fault. He is responsible for his own actions. Honestly he's just not my type and I have no desire to date him or any man for that matter. I have the kids and Olivia, I don't need anything else."

Olivia beamed and Buzz smiled softly, "Maybe in time you'll feel up to dating again but until then," he handed them the bags he had set on the nearest table when he pulled Frank back. "Here's your dinner. I'm fixing to head over and deliver some of the same to Rafe for his dinner. That hospital food is crap."

They both hugged and thanked him than grabbed their bags and headed home. They arrived a little before 6:00 and Natalia turned the oven on warm then put their food in to wait for Emma. While she was doing that, Olivia worked on setting the table for them. When Emma got home Olivia went out and talked to Judy's mom about Emma coming over tomorrow so they could be at the hospital with Rafe. She had no problem with that and said to just bring her by on the way to the hospital in the morning.

Once she came back in she found the food set out on the table and Emma and Natalia waiting on her. She smiled as she sat and they prayed before starting to eat. "So, Susan said we can drop Em off in the morning."

Natalia nodded and Emma looked up confused to her. "We're not going to church tomorrow?"

Natalia shook her head. "No mija. Remember when Rafe got sick yesterday?" Emma nodded and she continued. "Well he got sick again and they took him to Cedars. We have to go see him in the morning and they won't let you in to see him."

Her lower lip started to tremble. "Is he going to be ok?"

Olivia grabbed her hand, "Yes baby, he's with Uncle Rick. He'll be just fine don't you worry."

She took a breath and nodded. "How long will he be in the hospital?"

Natalia took her other hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Just a few days then he should be ok."

Appeased for the moment she started eating again. They both sighed happy that they calmed her fears for now and started talking about work and things to come in the next few weeks. They had a big wedding at the hotel a week from today, a Valentine's day charity ball that the hospital is holding hoping to get enough donations for the cardio wing the following weekend and spring break the week after. There would be a lot to do and they still had to deal with the lawsuits and trying to get Rafe home. All in all the next few weeks would be hectic.

After dinner Olivia cleaned up and Natalia took Emma up for her bath. They all settled in for a movie before bed. Olivia sat on the couch in one corner and Emma took the other. Olivia gave her a questioning look. Usually she wanted to be in the middle.

Emma just shrugged. "She's sad that Rafe is sick so she need's the middle."

It warmed her heart and brought a smile to her face. Their baby was such a sweetheart. "That is very thoughtful of you baby. Thank you."

Emma just smiled as Natalia came in with popcorn. She looked at them confused and they just shrugged so she just took her seat. Halfway into the movie the stress of the day finally won out and she was asleep leaning against Olivia. When the movie ended she looked over and noticed Emma had fallen asleep as well.

She chuckled and reached over nudging her. "Jellybean wake up honey." Emma groaned sitting up looking at her. "It's time to go upstairs baby. I'll be up to tuck you in soon."

Emma nodded and Olivia turned back to Natalia. "Nat, wake up it's time to go up to bed."

She woke up yawning sitting up to stretch. "Where's Em?"

"She went up already. I need to go tuck her in."

Natalia stood pulling her up with her. "Ok, why don't you go on up and I'll check the doors and come up to kiss her good night after."

Olivia smiled with a nod and headed up. Natalia cleaned up their popcorn mess, turned off the TV and DVD player, than checked all the doors and windows before going up herself. Olivia was coming out as she went in. She kissed Emma goodnight then made her way out of the room.

Olivia was waiting for her in the hall. "I just wanted to tell you goodnight and make sure you didn't need anything before I turned in for the night."

Natalia smiled then looked away. "No, I'm ok."

Olivia moved closer at the hesitance in her voice. "What is it?"

Natalia sighed. "I'm just… I need… I…"

Olivia pulled her into a hug. "Hey, it's ok. It's just me you can ask me anything."

It had been such a long emotional day and she was still so scared for Rafe if he had to go back to that prison. She was afraid to be alone and that nightmares would keep her up all night but she didn't want to overstep with Olivia either. "I just… I don't want to sleep."

Olivia held her tight rubbing soothing circles on her back. "If you're not ready for bed yet we can get some cocoa and sit on the porch for a bit."

Natalia shook her head slightly holding her closer afraid to let go. "No, I'm sleepy I'm just… I really just don't want to be alone."

Olivia smiled and pulled her to the door of her room. "Hold on just a second." She moved into her room and grabbed her toothbrush out of her bathroom and her pillow then came back out. She took her hand and led her to Natalia's room. "That's an easy fix. I'll just stay in your room with you tonight. If you want me to that is."

Natalia smiled and kissed her cheek. "I do, thank you so much."

Olivia blushed and they moved into the room and prepared for bed. Once they were settled in bed Natalia moved naturally into Olivia's embrace and fell asleep quickly. She did dream that night but when she awoke from those nightmares Olivia was always there to calm her and help her fall back asleep again.

The next morning they got up, ate breakfast and dropped Emma off before heading to the hospital. Natalia was a nervous wreck and probably wouldn't calm down before they got to see Rafe so Olivia hurried as much as possible. Once they arrived Rick met them in the same waiting room. He let them know that Rafe was fine and had a good night. No more drops in his levels.

He was currently trying to keep him for another night to give Olivia time to do what she could to hopefully get him home but he couldn't make any promises. He told them to wait there as he was still trying to get them in to see him. Olivia sat down with a huff pulling Natalia down next to her. Neither happy to be waiting.

An hour later Natalia was starting to shake. Olivia pulled her closer. "Hey, you need to breath and calm down sweetie. Rick said he was fine, his levels are good." Natalia went to talk but Olivia stopped her with a finger on her lips. "I know you need to see for yourself. I understand, I do but we need to be just a little more patient. Rick will take us back as soon as he can swing it."

Natalia nodded and buried herself in Olivia's neck. Fifteen minutes later Rick finally came and was able to take them to him. They spent the rest of the day with him and were able to eat lunch with him again. Like yesterday they just sat with him as he rested or talked quietly about this and that. Around 3:00 they were made to leave for the day but Rick was able to get him one more night there.

They headed home picking up Emma on the way. They shared a bed again that night as Natalia was more of a wreck the closer it came to him probably going back. Olivia held her through the night again soothing her the best she could. She prayed that tomorrow the governor would come through for her and they could bring their boy home. If not she would rain hell fire down on whoever she needed to.

She just needed their boy home and for Natalia to finally be completely happy. She sighed tightening her arms around her again and let sleep take her for as long as Natalia's nightmare were kept at bay. Tomorrow she would figure out their next step.


	5. Chapter 5

**Can I Say I love You**

 **Summary: After My Two Mommies and Natalia leaving after setting Ms. Jennings straight to go out with Frank. Natalia tries to figure out what she is feeling. Will she continue to run to Frank or will she own up to what she is feeling? Will Olivia? Or will they keep pushing their hearts away?**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and I do not make any profit from this.**

 **A/N: For the purposes of this story Doris never did or will do the PSA. She and Olivia are already friends and she and Natalia already know she is gay.**

 **Chapter 5**

The next morning after getting Emma off to school Olivia called Greg to handle things at the Beacon for the day and they headed back to Rafe. When they arrived there were extra people around the door to the waiting room and if Olivia wasn't mistaken two of them were Doris's goons.

Olivia smirked. "It's about damn time."

Natalia looked at her disapprovingly. "Language, about time for what?"

She just pointed to the door. "Doris finally listened to her voicemail." She had been trying to call her since Friday after his first incident.

They exchanged hellos with Doris's guards and two others and Olivia opened the door ushering Natalia through. She smiled seeing Doris sitting with the governor.

Doris saw them come in and walked over hugging Olivia. "How is he?"

Olivia sighed. "He's ok for now they finally got his levels under control."

Doris nodded and took Natalia's hand. "How are you holding up?"

Natalia shrugged. "As well as can be expected I suppose." She really didn't like Doris that much. She hated that she and Olivia were so close but she appreciated her being here to help.

Doris smiled squeezing her hand before dropping it and turning back to the governor. "Do you want to tell them or me?"

They exchanged handshakes all around and he motioned for them to sit. "I have spoken with the judge and we can release him based on the good record he has kept. He's been a model inmate and has even completed his GED, his anger management classes and has continued with counseling on his own."

They started to get excited but he stopped them. "I will only do this if you drop all charges you have against the state and let it rest."

Natalia looked at him like he was crazy. "Nothing will change in that place if their hand is not forced and they sexually harassed Olivia and endangered our son's life. How is it right to let that go?"

He shook his head. "I'm not letting it go. I am still going to form an official investigation and may call you too testify about what has happened to your son later but it will all come from my office."

Olivia smirked as she sat back throwing an arm over the back of Natalia's chair. "So, you are going to use our son to help you take down the prison system yourself to gain the extra votes in the next election." She contemplated this for a moment. "Not a bad idea as long as those bastards get what's coming to them for what they did to our boy."

He nodded happy she seemed to be going along with it but she shook her head. "Seems to me you're getting a lot out of this deal and we are just getting our son released. I'm also losing the money I could have gotten from these lawsuits."

She paused and shared a look with Natalia who was staring at her like she'd lost her mind and was jeopardizing Rafe coming home. Breaking eye contact she looked back to the governor.

He sighed and motioned for her to continue. "What do you want?"

She just smiled. He knew she had him by the balls. "I want his record expunged. He was a minor when it happened and I don't want it following him for the rest of his life. I want him to walk out of this hospital with us, today, free and clear to go home and not have to go back to that prison at all. No parole, no probation. Make that happen and I will do whatever I can to help you in your crusade on prison reform and we'll all testify when called. You can even hold a press conference when the time comes in our ballroom free of charge just so we can show our support."

The governor just stared at her for a moment then looked to Doris who just shrugged trying not to smile. On a sigh he looked back to her. "Done, just hold tight for the day until we can get the release papers, and once they are served you can take him home."

He stood and they all followed suit. He took Olivia's hand to shake and Natalia was instantly in her arms crying softly. "I must say Olivia I was a little shocked to see and hear that you are batting for the other team these days. She is lovely and this will help with another set of votes. Helping a family with lesbian mothers and their son who was mistreated in the system, it's gold. Have a wonderful day and I will get back with you on that press conference."

Olivia waved him off not replying, not even paying attention to him anymore as she as he walked out. Her sole concentration was on the crying woman in her arms. "Oh my god he's coming home, thank you Olivia."

She smiled and held her close. Doris just looked stunned. She had a feeling Olivia may swing that way with Natalia but to let the governor use that… they would have to talk later.

After a moment Doris stood. "Well, I need to get to the office and help expedite this so we can get you home hopefully by lunch. I'll call you in a while."

Olivia smile with a nod as she followed the governor out the door. Still totally immersed in the woman in her arms as they cried together, neither really hearing what either person had said.

Natalia finally sat back pulling tissues out of her bag to wipe their tears. "I can't believe you got him out and his record expunged. I thought sure you were going to anger the man when you argued for more after he said he was letting him go."

Olivia shrugged her head. "No, he knew that I had him. If we had kept up with the lawsuits we would have a hearing Friday and would have won. I didn't want to risk him going back and he used that as leverage so I pushed for more with expunging his record and bringing him home today by giving him a little more to help with his project and campaign. He may be a putz but he is good at his job."

Natalia just sat stunned and confused. "We would have had him home Friday and you let him talk you out of the lawsuits?"

Olivia pulled her close. "There was no way I was letting him go back to that hell hole if I could help it. If we had waited he wouldn't have gotten his record expunged. It's a win win and this way the prison get hit harder than just our little lawsuit and we don't have to pay for it."

Natalia melted into her again. "Thank you."

"You're welcome but I would have done anything to get him out and safe. I love him." she pulled her back enough to look in her eyes. "We need to find Rick and see if we can get in to see him but I don't want to say anything until we have the papers in our hands. If something goes wrong I don't want him getting his hopes up."

She nodded her agreement and they headed out to find Rick. They found him in his office. "Hey ladies, he's doing excellent today. The good and bad of that is he is doing good so I have to discharge him this afternoon."

Olivia just smiled. "Its fine Rick, just postpone it as long as you can this afternoon. They are going to release him and let him go home. We just have to wait for the papers to come."

Rick stood and hugged them both. "That's fantastic. Olivia I swear you never seize to amaze me."

Olivia just beamed and looked to Natalia. "Since we can't see him for a bit why don't we go and get some things for him. He doesn't even have clothes to leave in and I know we aren't getting his tester, strips and medicine from the prison for a few days."

Natalia nodded happily. "Yes let's go get the things he will need so when we get him out of here we can just go get Emma and go home."

Olivia smiled and turned back to Rick. "Alright we're leaving for a bit, call if anything changes or we can get in sooner."

They said their goodbyes and headed out, Olivia sending off a text. Natalia looked at her as Olivia got in reading the reply. "Everything ok?"

She just smiled. "Yes, I just text Mel to tell her what the governor was doing and get Rafe's clothing and shoe sizes."

Natalia cocked her head to the side in confusion. "Why does she have his clothing sizes?"

Olivia shrugged. "I noticed that he was bulking up and getting bigger so I had Mel get his sizes from the prison so we could get him a new suit for the hearing I was trying to get him. His old one wouldn't have fit."

Natalia just shook her head and sat back to enjoy the ride. She put a call into the pharmacy to get him a new tester, strips and insulin then they headed to the mall. Natalia picked up a few pairs of jeans and tee-shirts. Olivia insisted on getting his shoes and a new jacket. They picked up some new boxers, wife beaters and socks along with a few pairs of sweats and a jogging suit.

They finally had everything they thought he would need for a bit and were heading to the parking lot when Olivia changed direction. Natalia followed and came up beside her. "Where are we going now?"

Olivia pointed to a store. "We're going to add a line to our phone plan and get him a phone."

Natalia shook her head and stopped her. "Olivia that's too much."

Olivia sighed. "No it's really not. It only cost $10 to add a line and we will pick out whatever phone is free that has a built in MP3 player cause I know he likes to run. I'll even have the cost taken out of your check if it makes you feel better."

She thought for a moment and smile. "That sound good, thank you."

They went into the store and were able to get a line added, a phone for free, Olivia had them upgrade their phones too and were out of the store with 4 new and activated IPhones for each of them.

Natalia smiled and shook her head. "I can't believe you talked that salesman into giving us all new IPhones."

Olivia shrugged. "It was time to upgrade anyway and the Blackberries are out of date. I always get the free upgrades."

She chuckled. "Yes but the IPhones weren't on the list of free phones."

Olivia smirked. "It helps that the business account and all the phone lines and internet are through this company. I always get the good upgrades because of it. It's why we pay so little for the phone and internet at home."

Natalia just smiled and they gathered their bags to head out. They went by the pharmacy and picked up his order and a bunch of toiletries he would need. With a call to Doris letting them know it would be closer to 3:00 before they would be able to take him home they ran by and grabbed some food from towers and took it back with them to eat lunch with Rafe and wait for them to bring the papers.

When they entered he smiled brightly seeing the food bags. "Oh thank god. That stuff they gave me for breakfast was just… gross…" he shuttered and they all laughed.

Natalia kissed him on the forehead and handed him a container of food. "Here mijo, we got you Emma's favorite from towers, spaghetti and meatballs."

He fist pumped, "Score thanks ma, thanks Liv."

They all laughed then sat and ate just enjoying their time together. Natalia and Olivia tried to contain their excitement but the closer to 3:00 it got the antsier they both became.

Rafe watched them pace back and forth and if he wasn't mistaken it wasn't anxiety over him having to go back to the prison later. They seemed happy. "Ok what's going on? You two are going to wear a rut in the floor and you're making me dizzy."

They both stopped moving and looked at him but before they could speak Doris stuck her head in the room and called them out. They rushed out and left a flabbergasted and confused Rafe behind.

Once out in the hall Doris held up the papers and the governor came around the corner. "Ah ladies, I hope your day has been pleasant. I see Mayor Wolfe has the papers so shall we go in and give them to your boy?"

They nodded enthusiastically and followed him into the room. Rafe looked up confused at the man as he started to speak stealing glances at Natalia and Olivia. "Good afternoon Rafe. My name is Michael Andrews; I'm the governor of Illinois. On behalf of the state and my office I would like to formally apologize to you for your treatment in the prison system and let you know that you are now free to go home. The remainder of your sentence has been commuted and your record has been expunged. Enjoy your freedom and going home with your mothers."

He just sat there looking back and forth between a crying happy Natalia and Olivia and the governor. "Are you serious? I can just get up and go home?"

The governor chuckled. "Well not until your doctor says that you are ok but yes. You can go home now son."

Rafe's smile lit up the room as Olivia and Natalia rushed to either side of him hugging him tight. "I get to come home Ma."

Natalia kissed his temple. "I know baby, Olivia fixed everything."

He turned and pulled her closer whispering in her ear as his tears fell. "Thank you so much Liv, I don't even…"

She just kissed his head. "You don't have to thank me. We needed you home."

The governor and Doris smiled watching them together. "Well Olivia I guess I'll see you two at the Valentine's ball. The missus is very excited."

Olivia smiled, "We'll have a special table ready for her and tell Helen I said hi."

He nodded, said his goodbyes and left with Doris following shortly after. Olivia ran down to the car and grabbed an outfit and shoes for him. They let him shower and once he was dressed and ready Rick discharged him. He stood and pulled both women into his arms hugging them close. "I'm coming home."

 **A/N: Well there it is Rafe is finally free. What kind of reaction will he have as Olivia and Natalia continue to get closer and what the heck are they going to do when they figure out the governor and now Doris thinks they are an out couple. More to come so we shall see.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Can I Say I love You**

 **Summary: After My Two Mommies and Natalia leaving after setting Ms. Jennings straight to go out with Frank. Natalia tries to figure out what she is feeling. Will she continue to run to Frank or will she own up to what she is feeling? Will Olivia? Or will they keep pushing their hearts away?** **  
**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and I do not make any profit from this.**

 **A/N: Hello my lovely's, I know it's been over a month but I am back. I have been really super busy the last few weeks** **but I am in my new home now and just have a few boxes to finish unpacking so I am back at it. Thank you all for your patience and here is a new chapter.**

 **Chapter 6**

As Olivia pulls out of the Hospital parking lot Natalia turns to look at Rafe. "Well mijo what do you want for dinner? I might have time to make chicken and rice or we can order out or go out. What do you want?"

Rafe thought for a moment. "Can we go to the park before dinner? I know it's a little cold but I just really want to be outside for a bit before we eat."

Olivia glanced at him in the mirror. "That should be fine." She looked to Natalia. "Um, you told her we would take her to Company tonight for dinner since she wasn't home Saturday and Sunday we made her stay at Jody's. We can tell her that since Rafe is home he gets to pick tonight."

Natalia thought for a moment and shook her head looking back to Rafe. "You don't mind going to Company do you mijo. I promised Emma we could go as a reward for getting an A on her project."

Rafe smiled. "Of course not, any meal I eat with you guys is fine with me. I'm just glad to be going home."

Olivia parked and turned to him. "You can pick tomorrow."

He just shrugged as he looked out the window waiting for Emma to come out of the school his leg bouncing. "Its fine, what time does school let out?"

Natalia smiled. "In about ten minutes."

They shared a look and Olivia chuckled softly. "When she comes out, stay in the car until she makes it down the stairs so she doesn't kill herself to get to you."

Rafe just nodded and continued to watch out the window. When the bell rung his hand flew to the door handle. The moment he saw Emma he twitched, his leg bouncing faster and the second she was down the stairs he was out of the car.

They shared a smile as they exited the car after him. Emma caught sight of him as Olivia rounded the front of the car and stood by Natalia.

She stopped dead in her tracks staring at him then took off running screaming his name. He took off and met her halfway as she jumped into his arms. He scooped her up and they just held onto each other for dear life.

Emma burrowed into his neck. "You're here, are you staying, do you have to go back?"

Rafe smiled stroking her hair as he walked back to the car. "I'm home for good. Your mommy got them to let me out and come home."

Emma smiled looking at them. "We have the best moms in the whole world don't we?"

He chuckled looking to them. "Yes we do."

As they got back to the moms Emma hopped down and hugged Olivia tightly then looked up with a tear falling. "Thank you mommy I really missed my brother."

Olivia hugged her close. "It was my pleasure baby. I missed him too."

Emma turned to Natalia and hugged her too. "Do we still get to go to Company for dinner?"

Natalia chuckled. "Yes baby, we can but first we are going to the park for a little bit. You can show Rafe the new playground."

She whooped and grabbed his hand pulling him into the car. "Well let's go so I can show him."

They all laughed getting back into the car and headed to the park. Once there Olivia parked a little bit away from the playground to give him a chance to just walk before Emma wanted him to play.

They all climbed out and just took their time walking to the playground. Even Emma was content to just hold his hand as they walked quietly. He just enjoyed the wind on his face and his family close. Once they made it to the playground Emma pulled him along laughing to play.

Natalia sat pulling Olivia down to sit with her. "I can never repay you enough for giving him back to me."

Olivia turned to her and pulled her into a hug. "You don't have to repay me for anything honey. I wanted him home as much as you did. The only thanks I need is a tuna noddle casserole dinner on the next night I get to pick. I have a feeling tomorrow is going to be a chicken and rice night."

They both chuckled moving to turn back and watch Emma and Rafe. "I promise the night after next to make it for you if you want."

Olivia smiled nodding happily and they settled leaning into each other. An hour later Rafe and Emma fell onto the bench next to them and Rafe leaned his head on Olivia's shoulder. "We're hungry can we go to Company now?" he looked up at her with a pout, dimples flashing, batting his eyelashes.

Olivia slapped him playfully. "Yes we can go eat there is no need for the big guns. If you miss use them they won't work when you need them more."

They all laughed as they stood and he picked up Emma onto his shoulders. She smiles looking down at him whispering loud enough for them all to hear. "Don't listen to her. The dimples always work."

This caused them to laugh harder as Olivia swat her leg playfully and they started walking. They made it back to the car pretty quickly and were at Company in no time.

When Buzz saw them he rushed over and pulled Rafe into a bear hug. "Rafe my boy how in the world are you here?"

Rafe just chuckled hugging him back. "Olivia."

Buzz smiled and pulled her in for a hug too. "How did you manage this?"

Olivia just shrugged. "The prison wasn't taking care of his needs so the governor and I had a talk and he saw things my way and let him out. Free and clear with his record expunged but for now let's leave the details between us."

Buzz just shook his head indulgently. "Ok Liv. Why don't you guys have a seat and I will be over in a second to take your order?"

They all nodded and had a seat. Olivia turned to Natalia. "I'm going to use the restroom. If he comes back just order me an ice tea and I'll look at the menu when I get back." Natalia nodded and she walked away.

Once she used the restroom and washed her hands she headed back to their table only to run in to Frank in the hall. "Hello Frankie."

She moved to pass him but he blocked her. "We need to talk Olivia."

She shook her head, "No we really don't. I don't have time for this Frank my family is waiting for me to order dinner."

Frank just scoffed and blocked her again. "You don't know what family is. Natalia and Rafe are not your family."

She was starting to get angry but before she could say anything a voice behind him startled them. "Hey mom, ma was getting worried. We're ready to order."

They both looked at him stunned for calling her mom. She recovered quickly and move toward him. "Ok baby I'm coming."

Frank was still stunned and didn't move to keep her from passing. Olivia intertwined her arm through Rafe's and he led her to the table. "You ok Liv? He had no right to tell you we weren't your family. We are. "

Olivia smiled and rubbed his arm. "Of course you are honey. I'm fine, the day I can't handle that man is the day they put me in the ground."

Rafe chuckled. "Well, let's hope that day is many many decades away. I kinda like having you around."

Natalia looked up as they came back to the table. "Everything ok?"

Olivia smiled. "Yep, just a traffic jam in the hall, nothing we couldn't handle."

At her questioning look Olivia sighed. "It was the same problem we had the last time we were here. It's fine I promise."

Running a hand up her arm Natalia smile slightly, "Ok, we are all ready to order. Why don't you take a look and figure out what you want before Emma resorts to eating her own arm?"

They all laughed and ordered when Buzz came back. Frank sulked in a booth in the corner picking at his own dinner watching them. They didn't even notice he was there until they were getting ready to leave. They had been so wrapped up in their first family dinner with Rafe home that they hadn't paid him any mind.

He move to approach them as they were leaving but Rafe saw and put himself between them and him ushering them out the door before he could make it to them. Once they were in the car he leaned back with Emma leaning into him. "So what's up with the Frank thing?"

Natalia shook her head and Olivia scoffed. "He wants something he can't have and doesn't like it."

He looked at his ma for clarification and she sighed. "He wants to date me and I told him no. He doesn't like that answer and keeps pushing."

Rafe shook his head. "That dude needs to get a grip and leave our family alone."

Natalia just smiled. "I agree whole heartedly."

The rest of the ride was quiet and when Olivia parked in front of the farm house they turned to see both kids had fallen asleep on the way home. They shared a smile and turned back to wake them.

Olivia nudged Rafe's leg. "Hey buddy we're home wake up."

He opened his eyes and smiled brightly looking out the window at the house. "Wow ma it's so much bigger then the pictures make it look."

She just chuckled getting out of the car. "Wake up your sister than get the bags out of the trunk. It's all stuff for you. Bring it in and we'll show you your room and the rest of the house."

He woke Emma and they grabbed the bags making their way in the house. Olivia was putting his insulin in the fridge and Natalia was putting up his tester and strips turning to smile at Emma bouncing next to Rafe. "Em, why don't you show Rafe his room so you guys can put those bags down?"

Emma smile brightly. "Ok let's go Rafe it's this way."

He smiled and followed her with both moms behind them. Once they made it to his room he and Emma put his bags on the bed. Olivia handed him the bag with his phone. "We got you a phone on our account. Everything you need is in the bag. Tomorrow you can download whatever music you want I still need to download our ITunes account then you can activate your gift card and get whatever music or apps you can with it. Once it's gone we will figure out a way for you to earn more."

He looked at her in awe and pulled out the phone a set of ear buds made for running and an arm band. "Wow this is awesome. Thank you so much."

Natalia smiled. "We just wanted you to have a good phone with a music player for your morning runs. We didn't have time to set it up today, too much going on."

He just scoffed. "Yea like shopping for the things I need, breakin me out and telling off the governor."

They laughed and Natalia started pulling things out of the pharmacy bag. "Your insulin is in the fridge and tester is in the drawer closest to it. We also picked up toiletry stuff for you." He looked through them as she spoke. "We picked up several outfits, underclothing and shoes. We will make a list of what else you need and make another trip to the mall in a few days. We also got you some pajamas and a running suit for the morning. You can barrow my IPod for your runs until we get your phone set up."

He smiled looking over all of his things. "Thank you so much this is all great. Can we take a quick tour of the house so I can put my things away and get a shower? I'm really tired and just want to lay down."

They nodded and showed him the rest of the house and whose rooms were whose. Once that was done they sent Emma off to take a quick bath while Rafe put his things away. Once they were both settled it was pretty late and they all headed to bed.

Olivia was lying in bed just thinking over all that had happened that day when a knock sounded and Natalia stuck her head in. She motioned her in. "Hey, are you ok? What's up?"

Natalia shrugged, "I just can't seem to settle my mind to sleep."

Olivia smiled and lifted the covers. "Come lay with me for a while."

Natalia grinned and climbed in settling next to her with her head on Olivia's chest. After a few minutes Olivia looked down to say something and noticed that she was already sound asleep. She smiled and shifted pulling her closer and let sleep take her as well. Content holding her close and having their son finally home.

 **A/N: Ok Rafe is home and now it's time for our girls to figure out the rest and finally admit their feelings. A lot is bound to happen with all that is going on with work and the Governor's plans. My fairy tells me it's going to be a fun ride.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Can I Say I love You**

 **Summary: After My Two Mommies and Natalia leaving after setting Ms. Jennings straight to go out with Frank. Natalia tries to figure out what she is feeling. Will she continue to run to Frank or will she own up to what she is feeling? Will Olivia? Or will they keep pushing their hearts away?** **  
** **Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and I do not make any profit from this.**

 **Chapter 7**

The next week flew by and life at the farmhouse moved on, business as usual. The morning after Rafe came home they got up early and made a huge breakfast for the whole family, got Emma of to school and let Rafe tag along with them to see what they did all day. He had taken to following Greg around all week as he prepared for the two upcoming events. The week had been a flurry of activity in preparation of the wedding that was happening later that day.

Greg had worked like crazy with a lot of help from Rafe who was more than happy to do what he could and was with him right now in the ballroom doing last minute checks.

Greg took one last look and made the last check mark on his list excitedly. "Well, I think everything is just perfect here. This is to be the wedding of the year and we cannot have any problems."

Rafe chuckled at him. "It's all great, you need to breathe or you'll have a heart attack before the wedding party even arrives."

Greg huffed and moved away with a flourished wave. "Whatever, go play in the office with mommy."

Laughing Rafe turned and headed up to see what his ma and Olivia were up to. Natalia's office was empty so he headed to Olivia's. The door was opened so he stuck his head in while knocking softly. "Hey Liv,"

Olivia looked up from the computer and smile waving him in. "Hey sweetie, did you get tired of Greg's crazy on the day of an event?"

Rafe laughed and sat in the chair in front of her desk. "No he kicked me out. He finished his checklist and deemed it perfect."

Olivia chuckled looking back to her screen for a moment. "Give me just a sec." He watched smiling as her fingers flew over the keys and she pulled her bottom lip into her mouth as she typed. She finished with a flourish and turned back to him. "Ok payroll's done. Now, what did you need son?"

Rafe just shrugged. "Oh nothing really, Greg just didn't need anything else right now so I thought I'd come up and see if you or ma needed anything."

She smiled and stood typing out a message on her phone. "Well it's noon so why don't we meet your ma down in the restaurant for lunch? We have too much going on today to leave and I don't feel like take out."

"Sounds good to me, I'm starving." He rubbed his belly standing to follow her.

Olivia chuckled, "You're always hungry." He just shrugged with a laugh not disputing that fact as she guided him out the door.

They rounded the corner to the elevator and found Natalia getting in. She looked toward them and held the door with a smile. "Hey you two, going down?"

Rafe kissed her cheek as he entered. "Yep, I need food woman." They all laughed and headed down and ordered lunch.

They talked like always about this and that. Toward the end of the meal Olivia turned to Rafe. "So, are you still planning on helping Greg during the wedding?"

Swallowing he wiped his mouth with his napkin before answering. "If that's ok, yes I was. He was going to have me in charge of the groom and his party while he dealt with the bride and hers."

Olivia nodded pulling out her phone sending off a text. "The bridal party will be here in an hour. I have my tailor coming to make sure your suit is properly fit. He'll be here in 20 minutes or so and has everything you will need. All Beacon employees wear a Beacon suit during all big events. The style differs for what job they are doing. You need to be dressed appropriately if you are to represent the Beacon. The only ones not in uniform will be your ma and I."

He nodded and took a drink pushing his plate away. "That's fine where do I meet him?"

"When you go to our suite after lunch to take your meds just stay there and wait for him. He'll fit you there then you can just dress for the wedding and find Greg after to see where he needs you."

He nodded and stood from his seat. "I'll go ahead and head up now so I can shower really quickly before he gets here." He leaned over and kissed them both on the cheek before he headed off.

Olivia smiled after him then turned back to Natalia. "How has your day been? Did the morning meeting with the maid staff go well?"

Natalia sighed. "It went ok, some of them are still complaining about the hours they work. I have been thinking and I had a thought on how to split them up a little different that might be better."

Olivia thought for a moment and nods. "Write it up a proposal for me and I will look it over and sign it. We'll figure out when the best time to implement it will be. Definitely after the Valentine's Ball and spring break. I don't want major changes during that busy time but I have no problem splitting up the work differently if it helps."

Natalia shook her head. "I'd like to talk it through with you before we type it up to be implemented."

She just waved this off. "It's fine. If I have any changes or comments I'll let you know before I print and sign off on it. It would help me if you could just take care of that for me, I trust you."

Smiling shyly she sighed. "Ok, other than that the meeting went well. Our schedules are clear for the afternoon for the wedding. I'm still not sure why Greg thought that we should be around for it. I know it's a huge thing but we usually leave all of that to him."

Olivia shrugged. "When it is a big name sometimes it makes the client feel better if they request to have me there and he knows if I'm there you will be too. Our dresses were delivered an hour ago. I left yours hanging in Em's room in the suite with the bag you brought from home to get ready."

Natalia smiled and sat back finishing her wine. "Thank you, I'll go up after Rafe is finished and get ready. Did you finish up payroll and those emails this morning?"

"Yes, I finished it all right before I messaged you for lunch. I just need to sign them when I get back up. They should be finished printing. After that I think I'll head up when you do. We can get ready together then make our entrance to check on things right before they start seating guests."

Natalia agreed and they finished up and headed up to their offices so Olivia could sign payroll and they could shut down for the day. The wedding would be the last duty they had that day and they would head home after the reception. Emma was at Judy's for the weekend so they had no set time to get home.

Just as they were making their way through the lobby to the elevators a voice called out and stopped them. "Well hello Olivia, Natalia."

They turned and were stunned to see the Governor. Olivia recovered quickly shaking the man's hand. "Hello Governor what brings you to Springfield and the Beacon this weekend?"

He shook her hand then turned from her to shake Natalia's as well. "I'm here for my granddaughter's wedding."

Olivia shared a shocked look with Natalia then looked back to him. "We had no idea the wedding was for your granddaughter or we would have beefed up security for you."

He shook her head. "No, today is her day and I have my own private security that is dressed like guests. This is my baby girl's day. I don't want it over shadowed by the fact that I am here. I knew that we could trust that you would be discrete when you found out. I don't want a media circus when she should be the center of attention today."

Olivia nodded in understanding. "I will make sure that Security is alerted to the fact that the media is banned from the premises for the day. You could have informed me of your wishes and I still would have made the arrangements for you so it wasn't a problem. I'll make sure that no one outside of the wedding guests even knows you are here."

He smiled as pointed to the front desk and his wife who was checking them in. "We got a room for the night so we weren't milling about until she was ready for us. We also didn't want to drive home tonight after the party either."

"Well, we are heading up to our suite soon to get ready so we'll see you there. You have my personal cell so if you need anything at all please don't hesitate to call me."

Natalia took out a card and handed it to him. "This is my card with my cell on it as well. If for some unforeseen reason Olivia wasn't able to pick up please call and I will do whatever I can to help."

They shook hands again and headed their separate ways. Once all was finished in their offices they headed up and almost physically ran into Rafe as he was coming out.

He grabbed Olivia's arms to steady her and they laughed. "Sorry Liv I was just trying to hurry and meet up with Greg."

Once she was balanced her waved him off. "It's not a problem." She got a good look at him and whistled. "You sure do clean up nice."

He blushed and Natalia ran a hand up his arm and pick lint off his shoulder. "You look so handsome mijo."

He smiled shyly. "I don't look half bad if I do say so myself. But I did have a question? Why is my suit different from the other workers?" He looked down at his suit. He was wearing a black tuxedo that had the Beacon logo on the left breast pocket with a vest and tie. The tie was the same color that the staff wore just a different style.

Olivia stepped up to him and straightened it. "I told you that the suits differ from job to job. Your suit is like Greg's. You are working as his assistant today so your attire will say as much. You are not just a waiter you are in the role of management."

He looked to her shocked for a moment then shrugged. "Ok then. I'm going to head out now. I need to find Greg, see you down there." With that he hurried off excitedly.

Olivia and Natalia smiled after him then moved into the suite to get ready themselves. An hour later they emerged from their separate dressing areas and both stopped dead in their tracks. Natalia was sure she had stopped breathing. Olivia was wearing a gorgeous floor length emerald green gown that hugged every curve perfectly and came up over her chest and connected around the neck. He back was completely bare to the top of her bottom where the dress started again.

She caught her breath looking Olivia over. "You look beyond beautiful Olivia."

Olivia was trying to focus on her words but was having a mini heart attack and she was certain her heart skipped a beat. Natalia was wearing a floor length gown as well that molded to her body deliciously. It was dark purple almost black, sleeveless and showed a generous amount of cleavage.

She shook out of her daze and looked into Natalia's eyes. "You're breathtaking Talia. You're not supposed to out shine the bride but I fear you may do just that."

Natalia blushed beautifully and chuckled. "Oh you, I will not." Olivia just nods smiling and they both laugh. "Whatever you say Liv, we need to get down there so we can do a last minute check while Greg and Rafe deal with the Bride and Groom."

Olivia smiled bowing and motioned her forward with flourish. They both giggled at her antics and they headed off to the ballroom. As they entered they saw Rafe positioning the ushers and talking to some of the staff. The room looked as if royalty was getting married here today but it was beautiful and not overdone.

They looked around from a distance and just watched Rafe work. "He really is good at all of this. Greg loves having him around to help out." Olivia commented while observing him take charge.

Natalia shrugged. "I always told him he could do anything he put his mind to and I know he has enjoyed working with Greg too."

Olivia just hummed and put her hand on her lower back to guide her into the room. They checked in with Rafe and some of the other staff then moved back out to wait for them to start seating. Olivia and Natalia watched on as the wedding went off without a hitch. They were very proud of their staff for pulling off this massive production. It was quite impressive.

Once the ceremony was over it was time for the receptions. After the wedding party left the guests were left to drinks, dinner and music while they awaited them to return after pictures. Greg left Rafe to oversee the ballroom and he went with the wedding party to the gardens to take pictures.

Olivia and Natalia were sat at a table to the back right of the room so they could easily observe everything. It looked like everything was going as planned and they just proudly watched it all unfold.

 **A/N: Next up the reception, a talk with Rafe and the weekend at home.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Can I Say I love You**

 **Summary: After My Two Mommies and Natalia leaving after setting Ms. Jennings straight to go out with Frank. Natalia tries to figure out what she is feeling. Will she continue to run to Frank or will she own up to what she is feeling? Will Olivia? Or will they keep pushing their hearts away?** **  
** **Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and I do not make any profit from this.**

 **Chapter 8**

The reception was going wonderfully with Greg and Rafe on top of everything. Once everything was in full swing Olivia and Natalia moved to mingle and check in with the Governor and his family. When they approached the family they all smiled and greeted them.

"I must say Olivia I think you have outdone yourselves for this. Everything is wonderful." The Governor just beamed at them.

Olivia just smiled. "Thank you Andrew but the only credit I can take is hiring Greg and letting him and Rafe loose to do what they do."

He just chuckled and pulled a teenage girl closer to him. "Well they did an amazing job, give them a bonus. Now, can you please tell my youngest granddaughter Ciera here that it won't hurt anything if she and her girlfriend dance together? She is sure that they will be stoned or something."

Olivia smiled kindly at the apprehensive girl. "I assure you dear that I will not allow anything to happen to you. We are an all-inclusive establishment and I would have someone's head if they were to attempt to harm you."

She looked longingly at the dance floor and then her girlfriend then back to her and shyly replied. "You haven't been dancing."

"Well this is an event my hotel is hosting. We are not here as real guests but more so to supervise the staff."

The governor chuckled, "Nonsense, maybe if you and Natalia went out and danced she wouldn't feel so alone."

Olivia looked to Natalia who just shrugged then back to the others. "Sure, we'll go out first on the next song then you can come out and dance beside us if that would make you feel better."

The girls nodded vigorously causing her family to laugh behind them and Olivia chuckled taking Natalia's elbow to guide her to the floor. "Thank you for doing this. I hate for her to feel so scared. I think it will be ok, most of these people are from out of town and you won't have to see them again."

Natalia shook her head. "It's fine Liv. I'm happy to help her. It's hard to be different and so young too. I remember what it's like to be a teenager and shunned by those around you. I don't care what people think. Besides, I can think of worse things than dancing with you. The men in the room will all envy me."

Olivia looked over sharply at the last comment but Natalia just pulled her on the floor as a slow song started to play. Olivia shook herself out of her shock and took Natalia into her arms and started dancing with her. "Ok that statement kind of contradicts what happened last week after Emma's project."

Natalia sighed and looked around. "I know and I'm sorry for that but I really don't think this is the place for that discussion."

Olivia conceded the point and let it drop for the moment. She smiled as she saw they governor's granddaughter and her girlfriend come up beside them and start dancing. Natalia glanced over her shoulder to see what caught Olivia's attention and smiled as well.

She turned back and rubbed Olivia's shoulder. "We can talk about that later at home. For now why don't we just enjoy the dance?"

Olivia smile and pulled her a little closer just swaying together for a moment. She looked around noticed a few couples waltzing and turned back to Natalia pointing at the others. "What do you say we show these people how this dance is really done?"

Natalia turned to see what she was talking about and shook her head. "Oh I couldn't. I haven't waltzed in years I'm not sure I would remember."

Smiling Olivia changed the position of her hands and readied them anyway. "You can do it just follow me," and with that she guided Natalia into the dance.

It was either follow or stumble so Natalia just let herself be led. They dances beautifully together and after a few moments everything around them disappeared as they flowed across the floor in each other's arms. The crowd broke a bit giving them room and watching as they danced impeccable with one another. They were so totally lost in each other that neither saw anything but the woman in front of her. When the song ended and Olivia glided them to a stop they startled slightly at the applause that greeted them.

Natalia blushed and turned her head into Olivia's shoulder. Olivia just laughed and led her off the dance floor where the governor and the teens were waiting for them. "You dance beautifully ladies."

Ciera was bouncing in place. "That was awesome. I wish I knew how to dance like that."

Andrew chuckled. "If you really want to dear I will check on getting you in lessons next week."

She nodded enthusiastically and looked back to Olivia. "Thank you." Was all she said and she pulled her date back on the floor as a fast song started up.

The governor smiled after them and turned back to Olivia and Natalia. "Thank you both for that. She was just so nervous and it helps to see others like herself."

Natalia smiled. "It was our pleasure, besides it wasn't exactly a hardship to dance with this one."

They all laughed and he took her hand kissing it. "I imagine that it wasn't. You two enjoy the rest of the evening. I'm going to find Helen and talk her into dancing with me on the next one."

Olivia smirked with a wink. "Well let me know if you need any pointers."

He just laughed loudly shaking his head and headed off to find his wife. She chuckled after him then pulled Natalia toward the refreshment table. Once they had drinks they headed back to their table and had a seat. The rest of the reception went off without any problems and the bride and groom were off to the honeymoon suite.

Olivia and Natalia hung back as the last of the guests filed out and the staff started clean up. Rafe and Greg came up to their table and sat. "That was a monster boss. I'm so glad it's over."

Rafe chuckled. "Now you just have the biggest annual ball and fundraiser Springfield sees every year to get ready for."

Greg groaned. "Don't remind me I don't want to think about that until Monday."

They all laughed and Olivia sat back in her chair throwing an arm over the back of Natalia's. "You guys did great tonight. I…"

Before she could finish her sentence the governor came up behind her and interrupted. "Olivia, Natalia I just wanted to thank you again for making this such a wonderful event for my granddaughter. She was thrilled with all of it."

Olivia turned and stood shaking his hand. "Your welcome but as I said before, the credit goes to Greg and Rafe."

She pointed to them as they stood and shook his hand. He smiled at Rafe. "Well, it's good to see you out of a hospital bed and taking after your mother here."

He just grinned. "I was just helping out. I could never do the job ma does here."

Olivia waved him off. "That's ridiculous Rafe. You can do anything you put your mind to. I know you were taught that."

He blushed and said no more as he sat back down. They all looked over as Helen walked up and intertwined her arm in her husband. "I'm ready to head to bed Andy. I'm exhausted."

He just smiled and looked back to the others "Well that's my cue. Have a good rest of your night."

Helen reached out and took Olivia's hand. "Thank you for a wonderful wedding for my girl and helping my other girls to have some courage. We'll see you next weekend for the ball."

Olivia nodded and they all said their goodnights then she turned back to the guys. "Ok you two, the staff can take care of clean up. Greg, head on home get some rest and relax tomorrow. We'll see you Monday." She looked to Rafe. "We just need to change then we'll head out ourselves." They all agreed and headed to the elevator.

An hour later they were all showered changed and in the car when Olivia turned toward company. "I don't know about you two but I'm starving. I'm going to run by company, do you want to eat there or take it home?"

Natalia shrugged. "Let's just eat there than we don't have to worry about cleaning anything up at home. I'm exhausted and don't want to do anything when we get home but drink some cocoa on the porch then go to bed."

She nodded pulling into the parking lot and they made their way in and to a table. They all ordered and tucked in when their food was brought out. They talked and enjoyed each other while they ate. When they were done Olivia shared a look with Natalia who just nods to her and she turned to their son. "Rafe I wanted to talk to you about something important."

He looked up putting his silverware down giving her his attention. "Sure, what's up?"

"I've been watching you this week working with Greg and I'm very impressed with all you did to help with the wedding and just helping out with his everyday duties as well."

He just shrugged. "I was happy to help. It gave me something to do while you guys were working, just something to pass the time until I find a job of my own."

She smiled handing him an envelope. He opened it looking up confused holding up a check. "I don't understand? This is a lot of money, what's it for?"

"It's for the work you did this week. That is what I would have paid an assistant banquet manager for a week's work."

He shook his head still not understanding. "I didn't help Greg out expecting to be paid Liv. You don't have to pay me for giving a hand. You've done so much for me it was the least I could do. Please don't feel obligated to pay me when I try and help." He was getting a little upset.

She took his hand to calm him. "I know you didn't expect it but you did so much and that wedding was perfect. I'm not trying to buy you son. I'm trying to offer you a job."

He looked at her sharply. "A what?"

Olivia nodded and sat back. "Yes, Greg has been begging for an assistant forever and you two worked so well together. Natalia and I talked and we decided to offer you that job. You would be on salary and this is what your weekly pay would be."

He just sat there staring at them with his jaw on the floor. He couldn't find words. Natalia smiled and spoke for the first time. "We didn't know what kind of work that you were looking for but Olivia has been watching you all week and feels confident that you will be good in that position."

He was still sitting in shock looking between them and Olivia was starting to think he was upset with her. "You don't have to feel obligated to take the position. I just thought that you did so well and you seemed to like what you were doing… You know what we can forget it I'm sorr…"

He surged forward taking her hands. "No I want the job I was just shocked. That's a lot of money and I never expected to ever be qualified for an office job or anything. I mean I all I have is a GED I got in prison. I was looking for fast food and labor work."

Olivia scoffed. "With your mind, you need to be in an office. You would be wasting yourself in a laborer's job unless it was something you loved. Not that there's anything wrong with that kind of work but you have too much potential to be stuck in a job like that when you have options. It's just like I told your ma when I hire her to work with me. She was so much more than a maid and now look at her. She practically runs the Beacon and could do so without me if need be."

Natalia shook her head. "I could not."

Olivia released one on Rafe's hands and took one of hers. "Yes you can and you did several times while I was sick." She pulled her hand to join it with her other and Rafe's looking back to him. "If you want the job we can go in Monday morning and talk with Greg and I give you the official offer to go over. Do you want it?"

He nodded vigorously. "Yes ma'am. I really liked working with Greg this week and was planning on helping next week too but this," He held up the check and hand it back to her. "You don't have to pay me for this past week and this seems like way too much."

She shook her head and handed it back. "You earned this and it is a competitive wage. If you look up a job like this anywhere else you will find a similar wage for it. I'm not overpaying you because I love you. I am paying you a fair wage. I also expect you to continue to earn it just like everyone else on my payroll and I hold my staff to a high standard. You're not getting a free ride here you're going to work hard for it."

He looked to Natalia who just smiled and nods then back to Olivia taking the envelope from her hand. "Ok, I'll take the job. Thank you for having faith in me that I can do it. I promise to do my very best."

Olivia waved him off. "You proved this week that you could do it. I was just paying attention and I know that you will continue to do so."

He smiled leaning forward and hugged her pulling Natalia in as well. Once He released them with a kiss to each of their cheeks Olivia waved for their waitress. "Ok now that we've eaten and talked let's get out of here."

They all agreed and she paid for their dinner ordering a diet coke and two hot cocoas to go. Natalia looked at her questioningly and she shrugged. "This way we have no clean up at all. You did say that you didn't want to do anything but drink cocoa and go to bed."

Natalia smiled intertwining her arm in Olivia's. "Thank you."

Olivia squeezed her arm to her and they took their drinks and their son and headed home.

 **A/N: That's all for this chapter, more to come.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Can I Say I love You**

 **Summary: After My Two Mommies and Natalia leaving after setting Ms. Jennings straight to go out with Frank. Natalia tries to figure out what she is feeling. Will she continue to run to Frank or will she own up to what she is feeling? Will Olivia? Or will they keep pushing their hearts away?** **  
** **Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and I do not make any profit from this.**

 **Chapter 9**

When they arrived home Rafe headed off to bed and the girls sat on the porch to enjoy their cocoa. Natalia leaned into Olivia and sighed. "Thank you for giving him this opportunity."

Olivia just shook her head. "I'm not giving him anything. He earned it and he will continue to earn it. He deserves a chance to make something of himself and working in fast food is not going to get him anywhere. I only want what is best for him."

Natalia snuggled in closer. "I know you do. That's why I was thanking you. It's nice to have someone that shares my love for him and understands that he can be so much more if he could only have the opportunity to prove it. Thank you for loving him."

Olivia shifted and put her arm around Natalia and pulled her face up to meet her eyes. "You never have to thank me for loving our son. You told me the last time I thanked you for loving Emma that you don't need to be thanked. You told me that loving Emma was like breathing, it was just what god intended for you to do. I feel the same about Rafe so please don't thank me. Let's just love our children and leave it at that, ok?"

Natalia smiled through her tears and placed a chaste but lingering kiss on Olivia's cheek then leaned in and snuggled her face into her neck. "Ok."

Olivia tightened her arms and they just held on breathing each other in. Olivia shifted more comfortably on the bench pulling Natalia with her, not wanting to let go. After a few moments she sighed. "Can we talk about earlier now or do you want to wait until later?"

Natalia looked up at her confused. "What about?"

"About what you said at the wedding about not caring what people thought even though you definitely cared after Emma's presentation last week."

Natalia sighed and leaned back so that she could fully look into her eyes while they talked. "I'm sorry about that. I didn't handle that situation well at all and I'm afraid you got the wrong idea about how I felt about everything." She took a deep breath and looked out over the yard before softly saying, "I just was scared."

Olivia looked at her confused. "What were you scared of. You never have to be scared of me? I hope it wasn't me that scared you. If so I am so sorry."

Natalia quickly looked back to her and took her face in her hands. "I was not scared of you. You have nothing to be sorry for, so get that out of your head."

Olivia sighed and leaned in to connect their foreheads together. "Ok, then what was it?"

"You were so worked up over the whole thing. You seemed upset that people were thinking that. I understood before you decided to show me what you were talking about what was going on. I'm not that naive, I just didn't want to get into it all right then. I should have made that clear instead of playing dumb."

She sat back slightly and pulled her face up to look in her eyes better "Then you kissed me and I didn't know what to think. My mind totally blanked for a second then I asked you why and you back pedaled and I just…"

Before she could say more they heard tires on the drive and both turned to look as they heard a car pull in. They looked at each other in question and frustration then back to the car as it pulled to a stop and Frank stepped out.

Olivia cursed under her breath and Natalia just shook her head as they stood. Frank walked up to the porch and gave Natalia his lopsided puppy dog smile. "Hi Natalia, can we talk?"

She sighed heavily. "I don't know Frank, it's late and we were just about to head up to bed."

He moved forward up a step. "I know and I'm sorry for coming out so late but I really needed to talk to you."

"Fine, you have 10 minutes, talk." She crossed her arms over her chest just wanting to get it over with. She wasn't happy about being interrupted when she and Olivia were finally talking.

He gave a sideways glare at Olivia then looked back to Natalia. "Can we talk alone?"

Natalia shook her head. "Anything you have to say you can say in front of Olivia. I'd just tell her later and I'd feel better with her here anyway."

He didn't look happy about it but didn't protest any further. "Ok, I um… I wanted to apologize for the other day and that night. I shouldn't have kissed you like that but then you came to dinner that night and I just thought…"

Natalia held up a hand to stop him. "I'm sorry if I led you on with that. I was having a weird day and I honestly shouldn't have accepted your offer to go to dinner without expressing that it was as friends only but…"

He moved forward and cut her off. "It's ok. I understand that you are just not ready to date right now. Pop talked to me and helped me understand. I just wanted you to know that I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. I'll wait until you are ready to date again. We'll just be friends until then cause honey you are so worth the wait."

Natalia just stared at him stunned for a moment then snapped out of it as she heard a growl coming from next to her. She looked up at Olivia briefly putting a hand on her back to calm her then looked back to Frank. "I think you both totally misunderstood all of that Frank…"

"No I understand baby you just need time." He rushed forward and she and Olivia both shift so that she's slightly behind her and he frowns slightly at them.

The low growl was there again and she soothingly starts rubbing Olivia's back with the hand that is still there. "Stop calling me that Frank. I'm not your baby and I don't need time. I just don't want to date you or any other man. I have my family here with Olivia and the kids and it's all I need."

He started to speak again and she held up a hand to stop him. "And even if I didn't have those things I still wouldn't want to date you Frank. I just don't feel that way about you at all. You are just not my type and never will be. You have been a great friend to me Frank and I want to be able to stay friends but if you don't stop pursuing a romantic relationship with me we won't even be that anymore."

He just looks between them and shakes his head. "You need more than just your friends and son in your life Natalia. You need to take time for yourself. Women have needs just as much as men do, both emotionally and physically…"

"Oh Frankie her needs are taken care of, don't you worry about that. She has all she needs right here in our home." At this point Olivia has had enough. Natalia has told the man she doesn't want him and he just won't quit so she cut him off.

Frank starts turning red and shaking as she feels Natalia tense up beside her. Afraid she's gone too far she turns to look pleadingly into Natalia's eyes begging her to understand that she just trying to get him to back off. Natalia just smiles with a slight nod and they turn back to Frank as he explodes.

"What the hell Olivia. You can't just say stuff like that and give people the wrong idea. She's a god fearing woman for heaven sakes. You need to leave your innuendos for your own bedroom and your many, _many_ men."

Natalia steps in front of Olivia and pushes Frank back a step. "You don't get to come to our home and talk to her that way. She's only telling you the truth. I just told you that all I need is my family. Olivia and our kids are my family and they are all I need physically and emotionally. You just need to back off and not talk to her like that ever again. I won't have it."

"You can't be serious. You're telling me you two are together? I don't believe it. You are not this way Natalia, neither is Olivia. She likes men way too much." He's exasperated and pacing now.

"Oh for heaven sake," They are both just done with dealing with him and Olivia spins Natalia around to face her. She quickly looks at her lips and Natalia gives a slight nod before they both move forward and their lips meet.

The idea was to just give him a big ass clue but the moment their lips met they both totally forgot he was there. Olivia shifted and pulled Natalia into her closer. Natalia moved her hands from Olivia's shoulders up into her hair and they just lost themselves in each other.

Olivia ran her tongue over her bottom lip begging entrance but before Natalia could comply she was being pulled back.

"Stop this is just wrong!" Frank yells pulling Natalia to him and away from Olivia.

Olivia surged forward to grab her but they all stopped at the voice rushing out of the house. "Get away from my mothers Frank."

He wedged himself between them and pushed Natalia back into Olivia's arms then leveled himself on Frank. "Keep your hands off them you son of a bitch."

Frank looked up at him incredulously. "You don't understand what just happened."

Rafe shook his head angrily. "I know exactly what just happened. I've been standing at the door since right after you got here. I was just letting them take care of it unless they needed help. You've been told that you are not wanted here and you need to leave before you do anything else more stupid then grabbing my ma and I have to keep my mom from killing you again because if I hadn't come out that's what would have happened."

Frank turned his attention back to Natalia only to see her in Olivia's arms with both of them glaring at him and Olivia rubbing Natalia's arm where he grabbed her. He shakes his head and backs up. "This isn't over. I know this is a farce and you'll see in time that Olivia is poison and I'll be right here waiting for you."

Natalia pulled away from Olivia and moved in beside Rafe with Olivia moving so they are flanking her. "I told you not to talk about her that way. I will never want you Frank. LEAVE!"

He huffed and turned away rushing to his car and angrily pealing out of the drive. Natalia deflates the moment he is out of sight and falls into Olivia's arms. "My god why won't he just leave me be?"

Olivia kisses her head and sighs holding her close. "I don't know but I think it's time to talk to Doris about a restraining order or at least having a talk with the ass about staying away."

Rafe turned into them and put his arms around them. "Are you ok Ma? Did he hurt your arm? Do you need anything?"

Natalia turned her head and kissed his cheek. "I'm ok mijo I promise. I think I just need to sleep, I'm exhausted."

He nods and kisses them both on the cheek before releasing his hold. "Ok, I'm going to go back to bed unless you need anything else."

Olivia smiles and cups his cheek. "What made you come down? We thought you were asleep."

He shrugs. "I wasn't asleep yet. I was on the phone talking to Ashley talking about my new job when I heard the car in the drive. I saw that it was Frank and after Company the other day I decided to come down just to make sure you were ok. I wasn't planning on coming out unless I was needed. I knew once he touched you that Liv was going to kill him so I stepped in."

Olivia scoffed. "I could have handled Frank."

Rafe just chuckled. "I know you could mad dog but I kind of like having you here with us and didn't want you to go to jail for murder so I stepped in."

She just shook her head amused. "Fine, I concede your point. Now go on to bed baby, I'll make sure she gets settled in bed." He nods again as he makes his way back inside.

Natalia turns back into Olivia and buries her face in her neck. "I'm so tired of dealing with him. I don't understand why he won't stop."

Olivia pulled her closer and holds tight. "I don't know but I'm serious about talking to Doris. He needs to stop. I was so afraid he was going to hurt you trying to get you away from me."

Natalia sighed into her, gently kissed her cheek then pulled back slightly. "I agree with talking to Doris, we'll call her tomorrow. I'm ok, he didn't hurt me but I really just want to go to bed. Can we finish our talk later? I know we really need to finish it but I'm just…"

Olivia took her face in her hands and stopped her. "Hey, it's fine we can talk anytime. I'm not going anywhere. Let's go up and get you in bed."

Natalia deflated in relief. "Thank you. Can you… would you mind…"

Olivia brushed her thumbs over her cheeks. "Do you want me to stay with you tonight?" Natalia nods and Olivia pulls her back into her arms. "Then I'll stay with you. I'll sleep better myself that way too. Come on let's head up."

They pulled away from each other slightly and went inside. They locked up and went up the stairs going to their separate rooms to change for bed. A few minutes later Olivia called out for Natalia to come in as she knocked on her door. Natalia came in and they got in bed with her quickly finding her way into Olivia's arms resting her head on what was turning into her spot.

Since Rafe had been in the hospital they have spent more night sleeping in each other's bed for one reason or another than separately and this position is usually how they fall asleep. She sighs in contentment and kisses Olivia's jaw. "Thank you Liv, goodnight."

Olivia just smiles and kisses her head. "Anytime Talia, goodnight sweetheart."

Neither wanted to dwell on everything that happened or examine it any of it further that night and they quickly fell asleep in each other's arms content to just be together.

 **A/N: Hello my lovelies. Frank is an ass, what do you think of how they handled him? Sorry for the delayed update. Things are settling down now so I hope to update more often. Up next: a family Sunday, talking with Doris and more work at the Beacon.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Can I Say I love You**

 **Summary: After My Two Mommies and Natalia leaving after setting Ms. Jennings straight to go out with Frank. Natalia tries to figure out what she is feeling. Will she continue to run to Frank or will she own up to what she is feeling? Will Olivia? Or will they keep pushing their hearts away?** **  
** **Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and I do not make any profit from this.**

 **Chapter 10**

The next morning Natalia woke first as per usual. She moved to stretch but was stopped by the arm tightening around her. At some point in the night they must have shifted and Olivia was now spooning her, curled around her back. Natalia smile looking back at her peaceful face.

She smiled and turned back allowing Olivia to pull her into her more and just relaxing back for a moment enjoying their closeness. She knows they still need to talk and is not happy that Frank interrupted them last night but after dealing with him she just didn't have it in her to possibly lose Olivia the same night.

Honestly after everything from the last week and more she was hopeful that Olivia returned her feelings and if she could just be brave enough to talk about it with her she may just get all she desired. Unfortunately that little bit of doubt she still had that Olivia only loved her as a friend was still there and causing her distress. She still felt that Olivia deserved better than her but she was past the point of caring. She just wanted to be happy and Olivia was her happiness.

Sighing she hugged the arm around her close for a moment then shook it turning her head to look back at her. "Olivia… Liv, it's time to get up."

Olivia groaned and nuzzled the neck in front of her. "No… mslepin… comfy."

Natalia chuckled at her adorableness and shook her arm again. "We have to get up. Rafe needs breakfast and I have to get ready for church. I'm getting Emma after."

Olivia kissed her neck and sighed rolling away. "Fine, Rafe, breakfast, Emma."

She mumbled it all throwing an arm over her eyes and Natalia smiled leaning over kissing her cheek. "Come on, get up and I'll feed you before I go."

Olivia waved her off and rolled again while Natalia laughed and got up leaving the room. She walked down the hall and knocked on Rafe's door. "Get up mijo. Breakfast is soon and we have to be at the church in two hours."

She waited until she heard him call out 'yes ma' then moved to her own room. She showered quickly and changed before heading downstairs to start breakfast. Rafe came down a little while later dressed in a pair of black slacks, wing tipped shoes and blue button down that Olivia had picked up for him insisting he needed several sets of dress clothes.

He hung his new leather jacket over the back of his chair, moved to the coffee pot then to Natalia kissing her cheek. "Good morning ma. Did you sleep ok? How's your arm?"

She smiled rubbing his arm. "Yes mijo, I slept very well thank you and I'm fine so no worries. Can you set the table for me please?"

He nodded taking a sip of his coffee than moved to do as he was asked. Once he was finished he sat and they talked about this and that. She was just about finished setting out all of the food on the table when Olivia came in fully dressed in one of Natalia's favorite business suits.

Natalia had to take a deep breath after losing hers for a moment. "Good morning Liv. Are you going in to the office this morning? If you wait I can go with you after church."

Olivia shook her head as she sat and grabbed the cup of coffee Natalia handed her. "No, I thought I would go with you guys to church. Frank goes to that church too and I don't want you to have to deal with him alone."

Natalia just smiled and put a hand on her shoulder. "I appreciate that but we are not going to our usual church today. Judy's mom invited us to come to their church with her family this morning and I said we would. Emma wanted to go to Sunday school with Judy and she likes that church better so we're going there today."

Olivia shrugged. "Oh, well, I think I'll go anyway if you don't mind me tagging along especially if I don't have to sit through Father Ray."

Rafe chuckle and Natalia slapped him playfully. "That's enough. Don't be disrespectful."

He just smiled. "Oh come on Ma. The man is as dull as a spoon and just drones on and on. I hope the preacher at this church is better. The one I saw in prison was better than him. He actually made me want to pay attention and not just attend because I'm supposed to. He reminded me of the preacher we had in Chicago."

She smiled and cupped his cheek. "We'll see how things are at this new church. I did a little research on it when Susan asked us to come. If we like it maybe it's time for a change."

Rafe smile happily and Olivia looked up to her shyly. "You don't mind me coming too do you?"

Natalia sat and took her hand giving it a squeeze. "Of course not, I love that you want to come with us."

Olivia nodded slightly as they joined hands to pray then turned to her own plate to eat. The rest of breakfast was filled with random conversation like every other day then they cleaned up the kitchen and headed to church. After parking Olivia moved to open Natalia's door and they went in.

Judy's family and Emma were already seated when they came in and Emma spotted them, jumping up to run into Rafe's arms.

Natalia looked at her disapprovingly. "Emma I know you're excited to see us here but you know better than to run in the sanctuary."

Emma looked down chastised. "I'm sorry ma."

Natalia was taken back for a moment at her calling her ma but shook it off quickly. "It's ok but just make sure you mind your manners better from now on."

Emma smile shyly and reached over to hug her. "Yes ma'am, I will." She wiggled down and latched on to Olivia. "Mommy, you're here. I thought you didn't like going to church?"

Olivia just shrugged. "I thought I'd come with the rest of the family and see what all the fuss is about. Natalia said you really like it here so I thought I'd come and see why."

Emma clapped happily. "Oh it's so much fun and the preacher man is funner to listen to than to the one at our regular church. You'll like him better mommy."

They all chuckled and Rafe nudged Natalia's shoulder. "I told you so."

She just sighed and laughed with the others. "Ok fine let's just find our seats." She turned to Susan and shook her hand. "Thank you for inviting us. I hope you don't mind me bringing my whole sarcastic brood with me."

Susan smile. "Not at all, we saved some space for you all down next to us."

They all followed and settled in the pew talking quietly waiting for the service to start. When the preacher came out and called the congregation to their feet to pray Rafe perked up and leaned in to whisper to Natalia. "That's the preacher from the prison."

He smile brightly and bowed his head to pray. Natalia smiled at his excitement and did the same. After the service Rafe was bouncing next to her. "What did you think of him ma, wasn't he so much better?"

She ran a calming hand over his shoulder. "Yes mijo, I enjoyed the service a lot. He was fun to listen to, made the service less stuffy I guess."

He nodded excitedly. "Do you think we could come here from now on instead? It's an Episcopal church like we went to with Nana and Grammy."

"We'll talk about it at home later baby. I've been thinking lately about changing anyway so we'll see."

He looked to Olivia. "Come on Liv, you'd come with us to church every Sunday if it was to hear this guy wouldn't you?"

He gave her the dimples and she was about to cave when Natalia pulled his face to look at her. "We'll talk about it at home. Don't put her on the spot like that Rafe."

He looked back to Olivia sadly. "I'm sorry Liv I didn't mean to do that. I wasn't thinking."

She smiled and pulled him to her wrapping him in her arms. "It's ok we'll talk about it at home. Now is just not the time son."

He nodded into her then pulled back. "Can we go so I can introduce you both to him? He really is awesome and helped me a lot."

She looked to Natalia who nodded. "Sure let's go."

They followed the line out as everyone greeted the preacher before heading out. Judy and her family had made it out already and they were next up. When they made it to him he pulled Rafe in to a big hug and teared up.

"My goodness boy it's good to see you. They told me last Sunday when you didn't make it to service that you were in the hospital and the hospital wouldn't let me in to see you. When you didn't come on Wednesday night they told me that you didn't come back from the hospital. I was so scared that they had caused you to fall into a coma or die because of their negligence and the hospital wouldn't release any information."

Rafe released him and stepped back. "I'm ok now. My mom was able to use the fact that they put me in the hospital to our advantage and I am now free and clear."

He beamed patting him on the back joyfully. "That is wonderful Rafe. I'm so glad to hear that. I hated what was going on there. So what brings you here my boy? I thought you were catholic."

Rafe just smiled. "My little sister stayed the night with her friend and they invited all of us to join them today for church. I was so happy to see you. I had no idea where you preached or if you were even from Springfield or one of the outlying towns."

"Nope I'm from right here. This was my church when I was a boy." He turned to Olivia and held out his hand. "You must me Olivia, it's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Father Richard."

Olivia shook his hand and he turned to Natalia. "And you must me Natalia. You have and amazing boy. If he can just keep his nose clean he will do very well for himself now that he is home. You should be very proud of him."

They just smiled at him and Natalia shook his hand as well. "We are very proud of him. Thank you for being there for him when we couldn't. He speaks very highly of you Father."

He smiled and looked to Emma. "Well young lady I see you got your family here like you wanted. I hope you all enjoyed the service."

Emma nodded happily. "Oh yes, I'm so happy they all came for me."

He rubbed her head affectionately and looked back to Olivia and Natalia. "You can be proud of this one too. She's quite a little lady. I hope you will join us again in the future."

Natalia smiled and pulled Emma into her. "We just might Father but for now we'll let you go. Thank you for a wonderful sermon this morning."

He took her hand again and nods. "It was entirely my pleasure."

They all said their goodbyes to Father Richard and Judy's family then piled in the car. Half way home Natalia turned to Olivia. "It's a really nice day today, not too cold. What would you say to a picnic lunch by the pond?"

At the cheers from the back seat she smiled. "Sounds good to me, but while we're packing the cooler you need to finish your homework jellybean so we don't have to worry about it later."

Emma said she would and Olivia detoured to the grocery store and picked up a few more things they wanted for their picnic and headed home. Once home they all went their separate ways to change and get ready for their picnic.

 **A/N: Ok that's the second chapter today and I am almost done with the next so let me know how you like the pace and flow of the story or if I should make some changes. I was not sure if this chapter was up to par with the others but here it is anyway. Up next the picnic and a surprise visitor.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Can I Say I love You**

 **Summary: After My Two Mommies and Natalia leaving after setting Ms. Jennings straight to go out with Frank. Natalia tries to figure out what she is feeling. Will she continue to run to Frank or will she own up to what she is feeling? Will Olivia? Or will they keep pushing their hearts away?** **  
** **Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and I do not make any profit from this.**

 **Chapter 11**

After she changed into a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt Olivia made her way to the kitchen to help prepare their meal. Natalia was leaning in the refrigerator pulling things out giving Olivia a perfect view to gawk at. Olivia stopped dead in her tracks and whimpered at the sight.

Natalia heard her and turned just catching where she was looking before Olivia looked away. With a smirk she stood and put the things in her arms on the counter. "You ok Liv?"

Olivia cleared her throat. "Huh? Yea I'm f-fine. What can I do to help?"

Natalia smile and pointed to the pantry. You can get some of the cookies I made and put them in a baggie. Don't forget to grab some of the sugar free ones I made for Rafe."

She nodded and moved to do as she was asked. They worked together quietly getting everything ready. They were just putting the lid on the two ice chests they were using when Rafe and Emma came in. "Hey, I checked over the munchkin's homework. It's good so were ready when you are."

Olivia turned and smiled at them. "We're ready. Why don't you go grab the little wagon out of the barn to drag these to the pond with?" Rafe followed after a running cheering Emma and they got the wagon.

Later after they were finished eating Olivia and Natalia sat together against a tree and watched as Rafe and Emma ran around playing together. Natalia leaned into Olivia and sighed in contentment. Olivia turned her head and kissed the top of Natalia's. "Have you decided what you want to do about the new church?"

She shook her head. "Not yet, what do you think?"

Olivia shrugged. "That's really not my thing. I'll leave that up to your expertise. Emma and Rafe seemed to like it though."

Natalia sat up to look at her. "Yes they did. I'm just curious as to what you thought about it. I mean if we went back there would you ever go again?"

Olivia looked out over the field where the kids were playing deep in thought for a few moments then looked back to Natalia. "If I had to choose between the two I'd choose the one from today. Your other church is too much like my mother's church and makes me uncomfortable. If it hadn't been for me worrying about Frank I wouldn't have even tried to go today. The church this morning didn't make me feel uncomfortable."

"So you'd come back with us if I decided to pick that church?"

Olivia shrugged. "I mean I'm guess I would. I don't think I will go every Sunday but definitely more often than I do now. I know that Easter is coming up after spring break and I wouldn't be opposed to going then. Honestly I would feel more comfortable with Emma in that kind of church than the other. I won't ask her not to go if you decide to stay where you are because she likes going but I like the other place better."

Natalia smiled and leaned back into her. "I really liked all of us going together today. It made me happy and I liked the way Father Richard delivered the sermon. Rafe's right, he's a lot like our preacher in Chicago. If the kids are happier there and you are more comfortable with it, we're going to switch permanently."

"Make sure it's what you want too Talia. Don't let me be a deciding factor."

Natalia sat back up and pulled her face to look into her eyes. "I can worship god anywhere and I do feel more comfortable where we were today but you are a contributing factor to everything our family does just like the kids and I are. I would rather all of us be happy with this choice and for me to choose my current church would be selfish of me to not take into account what the three of you want. Lucky for me it's what I want too, ok?"

Olivia sighed and leaned into her to lay their heads together. "Are you sure?"

She rose up and kissed her forehead. "I'm more then sure."

"Ok."

Natalia smiled. "Ok."

They resettled next to each other as Rafe and Emma came over and plopped down on the blanket in front of them. Emma lay with her head in Natalia's lap. "Did you talk about our church yet ma?"

They both chuckled as Rafe perked up to listen to the answer. Natalia rubbed Emma's hair smiling. "Yes, we decided that this morning's church will now be our home church. We won't be going back to the other."

They both cheered and high fived then Emma turned to Olivia. "Does that mean you will come with us from now on mommy?"

Olivia smiled and leaned further into Natalia. "I'm not sure if I'll come every week but I will definitely come occasionally."

Emma squealed and hugged her tightly. "Thank you mommy, I really liked having us all together at church."

Olivia was about to answer when they heard a car door closed and looked toward the house and the driveway. Olivia sighed. "So much for a quiet Sunday."

They watched as Father Ray got out of his car and made his way to them. Natalia rubbed her arm as they stood. "He's probably just checking in since I missed the last two Sundays." She turned to Rafe. "Why don't you and Emma pack all of this up and play some more while Liv and I go talk to Father Ray. You can bring it all in when he leaves and we'll make some hot cocoa and play a game before I start dinner."

Rafe nodded and pulled Emma with him to play tag while she and Olivia made their way to Father Ray. When they were within range Natalia spoke first. "Good afternoon Father, what brings you out today?"

Father Ray just shook his head. "I was concerned for you Natalia. We haven't seen you in church for the last few weeks."

She just shrugged. "Last week Rafe was in the hospital and this week Emma spent the night at a friend's house and we were invited to attend church with them this morning so we all decided to do that."

He eyed Olivia then looked back to Natalia. "You all did?"

Natalia nodded and motioned to Rafe and Emma. "Yes we had a lot to thank the lord for. Rafe was released and came home for good this past week so he, Olivia and I went to church with Emma and her friend's family to give thanks for our blessings."

He just looked over to the kids then Olivia and back to Natalia again. "Well, I hope to see you and Rafe back next Sunday."

She shook her head. "No, Rafe knew the preacher that was presiding over the church that we attended this morning and he and Emma both like it there better so we will be attending there from now on."

He just looked at her incredulously. "You're going to let children dictate where you worship?"

"No but I do take in consideration my whole family when making this choice. All four of us feel more comfortable there so that's where we will be going."

He shook his head and sighed. "Natalia, you and Rafe have been members of our church for years. You can't make such a decision on a whim."

"I'm not making it on a whim. I have been seriously thinking of changing churches for a long while now ever since Emma went to church with her friend and I found out there was an Episcopal church just outside of town. I chose to attend your church when we moved here because I was unaware of its existence. Honestly if I had known it was there I never would have attended your church at all."

"Are you sure that you are not being influenced by someone else to stop attending?"

She scoffed. "Like who Father? I told you I would have attended the Episcopal Church had I known it was there. The Catholic Church is the closest to it so I chose to attend there for that reason alone. The Catholic Church turned me away before but I love god and I wanted a place to worship so I put aside my feelings about that and went anyway. Now that I have found this church and have attended with my whole family and all of us are liking it better I am more than happy to call it home. I'm sorry if this upsets you but it's how I feel."

He just stared at her incredulously and shook his head. "So what I was told today about you was true. You have let this _woman_ steer you awa…"

Natalia held up a hand. "I don't know what Frank told you and I really don't care but you will not come here and talk about her that way. This is _our home_ and you can leave now."

"Natalia…"

She shook her head. "NO! I'm done talking to you. Thank you for proving to me that I made the right choice. LEAVE!"

He sighed and as he turned to leave he looked back over his shoulder before walking away. "I will pray for you Natalia."

She just scoffed. "That's not necessary."

He turned back and walked away sadly. Natalia stood there shaking with anger just poring off of her in waves. Olivia stood in shock at what just transpired. Never had anyone defended her in such a way. She shook out of her shock and took notice of the state Natalia was in. She moved quickly up behind her and hugged her close resting her chin on her shoulder. "Ok now breathe Talia."

Natalia melted back into her. "The nerve of that man coming into our home like this just because Frank told him whatever he told him. Like it's any of their business anyway."

Olivia held her closer. "It's ok. You don't have to deal with him anymore if you are sure that you still want to change. Father Richard seemed so much less judgmental."

Natalia turned her head to look into her eyes. "After that, I have absolutely no doubt. I don't want anything that man believes poisoning our children and I will not have him or anyone else talking ill of you."

Olivia sighed and opened her mouth to respond but they turned at the sound of the wagon coming up behind them. Rafe eyed Natalia warily. "Everything ok ma?"

She just smiled and nods. "Yes, Father Ray just proved to me that I was right in my decision to change churches for us all. Come on, let's get all this in and put away so we can play a game."

The all agreed and Olivia smiled as Natalia fell in beside her linking their arms together. "How about we order some pizza tonight so we can just keep playing games and don't have to stop to cook?"

Natalia leaned into her and rested her head on her shoulder as they walked. "Sounds like a good plan to me."

The rest of the day was spent playing Monopoly, Sorry and Twister. They ordered pizza for dinner and when the night was winding down they cleaned everything up and settled to watch a movie together. Rafe and Emma chose Lilo and Stich and snuggled up on the floor in front of the couch leaving it for Natalia and Olivia.

When the movie was over Rafe cared a sleeping Emma up to bed and kissed them both goodnight. After they locked up they went up to their separate rooms to ready for bed. Olivia was just settling in when Natalia knocked and came in. No words were spoken as she closed the door and climbed in on her side and settled herself in to her spot on Olivia's chest.

She lay there for a moment just listening to Olivia's heartbeat still upset with her talk with Father Ray but calming with every moment that Olivia was wrapped around her. "Goodnight Liv."

Olivia tightened her arms and murmured into her hair. "Goodnight Talia," and they both drifted off to sleep.

 **A/N: Ok that's all for now, more to come later. Next up: working together at the Beacon and the Ball.**


	12. Chapter 12

**Title: Can I Say I love You**

 **Pairing: Olivia/Natalia  
Rating: NC-17  
Summary: After My Two Mommies and Natalia leaving after setting Ms. Jennings straight to go out with Frank. Natalia tries to figure out what she is feeling. Will she continue to run to Frank or will she own up to what she is feeling? Will Olivia? Or will they keep pushing their hearts away?  
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and I do not make any profit from this.**

 **A/N: I just wanted to add a little note here to let you all know a few things. I know that I haven't been updating as often as I used to and that upsets me more than it does you. Writing has become my outlet, my stress reliever but for the last 6 months or so my hands have been giving me a lot of more problems than was normal. As most of my readers that have been with me since Saving Ma know I have a lot of medical crap that I deal with and now the doctor told me this week that I have carpal tunnel on top of all my other stuff. Fun for me right? Not. Any way it makes it harder to type so I expect to not get back to writing as often as I did before but I will not be stopping. I will write until my poor little hands won't let me anymore so rest assured that I will be finishing all of my stories and have plans for more. Just continue to be patient with me in how often they get updated. Ok that's my little rant so on to the story…**

 **Chapter 12**

The rest of the week was hectic getting ready for the Charity Ball. They had been so busy between working extra hours and trying to spend time with Emma that they had had zero time to just talk. Every night they would come home, quickly get dinner on the table than spend some time with Emma and Rafe. One night Doris and Ashley had even joined them for a game night. They played monopoly in teams Olivia and Natalia, Doris and Emma, and Rafe and Ashley.

Doris and Emma demolished the others, bankrupting them all. Later that night Doris had wanted to talk to them about the upcoming ball and the Governor's campaign but instead they talked to her about their problems with Frank angering her so much that she forgot about what she had wanted to talk to them about. She promised to speak to Chief Wolfe the next day and they would give Frank a warning to stay away from them. After that she and Ashley headed home and they went up to bed hopeful that she could help keep him away.

Every night they slept together in Olivia's room. Once they all broke off to ready for bed each night Natalia would always make her way back to Olivia. They no longer made excuses or asked one or the other, it was just what they did. Natalia would come in, Olivia raising the covers, Natalia climbing in and Olivia engulfing her in her arms before they settled and fell almost instantly to sleep. Both were too afraid to ask questions or say what they were feeling.

It was now Saturday once again and the ball was that evening. Olivia was sitting in her office typing a staff email that needed to be sent out immediately. It should have been sent out by HR earlier in the week but it had slipped the woman's mind and now Olivia was stuck and ready to kill the woman. She was muttering to herself as she typed when Natalia came in unnoticed so she closed the door loudly enough to let Olivia know she was there without startling her.

Olivia looked up and sighed when she saw her standing there and hit send. "We are screwed tonight. I hope you remember how to serve drinks because we might be running the bar or waiting tables."

Natalia came around the desk to look at what she had been typing putting her hands on Olivia's shoulders and lightly massaged them to calm her. "What happened?"

Leaning back into her she took a deep breath calming almost instantly in her presence. "Sarah in HR didn't send out the email asking for volunteers for overtime tonight and we are going to be severely understaffed. I sent out a staff wide email but at such short notice I doubt we will get the volunteers we need. We are at least 6 people short."

Still rubbing one shoulder she reached over and grabbed the phone dialing HR. "… No Sarah its Natalia… I know I just heard… No you're not fired just listen… Ok, I need you to call Martha, Simone, Carla and Carmen from the maid staff and ask them if they are willing to work tonight. Tell them that it is overtime and they will be given an extra PTO day to use at their convenience. Then call Mark and Richard from the Restaurant staff and Luis, Jack and Melinda from the laundry room and offer them the same. Get right back with me and let me know what they say… Ok just hurry and get it done."

With that she hung up and went back to rubbing both of Olivia's shoulders. "That was nine so at least six of them should say yes and if more do so much the better. I know that those people can always use the overtime and an extra day of PTO is never amiss."

Olivia looked up at her in awe. "How do you do that?"

"How to I do what?"

"I'm here having a mini stroke and you walk in and know just what to do to make everything better."

Natalia smiled and shrugged. "I guess that's why I make the big bucks and you keep me around."

Olivia laughed and winked. "No I keep you around because you're pretty. The other is a side bonus."

Natalia slapped her arm playfully and picked up the ringing phone. "Olivia Spencer's office… Ok excellent and Sarah… It would be a very good thing if this never happened again. Ms. Spencer is not happy about this… I know… Ok bye." She hung up and headed over to Olivia's closet getting her purse. "Ms. Spencer, we have seven out of the nine coming in tonight so I will not be serving drinks or waiting tables. Now feed me woman, Rafe is waiting in the restaurant for us."

Olivia chuckled as she stood and followed her to the door. "Fine, since you found me workers I will feed you. How was your morning?"

Natalia just shrugged. "It was ok. I finished going through those files you wanted me to and the quarterly reports you needed are ready. I think my eyes are going to fall out after looking at the computer screen for so long but other than that I'm good."

Olivia looked to her concerned. "Hey, don't overdo it and get a headache before tonight. We have a long night ahead of us."

She just waved her off and smiled. "I'm fine Liv, I was just joking. I'm finished for the day anyway and I thought about checking in with the boys on tonight's preparations then taking a nap before getting ready for tonight."

Olivia groaned. "Oh that sounds like heaven but I still have things to do this afternoon."

"What do you still have to do? When I checked earlier you just had a few emails left to go over then you were done for the day too."

She shrugged. "I figured if I was here I may as well take care of those proposals that I was putting off until Monday."

Natalia shook her head. "Liv it's Saturday, we shouldn't even be here. Come up and take a nap with me so you aren't so tired tonight when we have a ballroom full of guests. Please… for me?"

Olivia sighed and nodded. "Ok."

Natalia smile and twined their arms together as they walked into the restaurant happy she had gotten her to agree to rest later. Rafe stood as they approached the table and Olivia pulled out a chair for Natalia and they all sat. Rafe smiled as the waiter brought over Olivia and Natalia's usual drink orders.

"How has your morning been mijo?" Natalia asked pulling the pill box out of her purse and handing it to Olivia.

He smiled at this and leaned back. "It's been busy. I thought Greg went nuts over that wedding but this is a whole new level of crazy."

They all laughed and Olivia shook her head. "Oh you haven't seen anything yet. Wait until the end of the year when we have our New Year's party."

Rafe looked up in terror. "You're joking right? He doesn't get worse does he?"

Olivia almost fell over laughing so hard at the look on his face. Natalia chuckled and shook her head at Olivia's antics. "No, we don't even have a New Year's party unless it is a private one. Olivia is pulling your leg. This is our biggest event of the year. Although the Halloween masquerade ball is on par with this one, but it doesn't get worse."

Rafe looked at Olivia and held his chest dramatically. "I can't believe you would do that to me. I thought you loved me mom?"

Olivia slapped him playfully. "I do love you. That's why I have to keep you on your toes. Keep taking notes son."

Rafe laughed and they all looked up as their waiter came back for them to order. As they finished their lunch Olivia leaned back and looked to Rafe. "So did you decide whether or not you were bringing a date tonight?"

He nodded taking a final drink. "Yes, I asked Ashley if she wanted to come with me."

Olivia smiled. "Nice choice. Oh by the way you need to meet my tailor in the room at 1:00 for your fitting."

"I did that last weekend. My suit was dry-cleaned and is in the closet up there already."

She shook her head. "I know but this is for your formal tux. These bigger functions you won't wear the Beacon logo. You just wear a plain tux."

He shrugged and checked the time. "Whatever you say boss lady, I guess I'll head up there now." He stood kissing them both on the cheek and headed out.

Olivia watched him leave then back to a smiling Natalia. "What?"

Natalia shrugged. "Nothing…"

Olivia stood and held out a hand to help her stand. "That was not a nothing look."

She just smiled. "You didn't have to get him a tux Liv. These functions are formal but his nicest suit from home would have worked."

Olivia shook her head. "Every gentleman should have a tux for these kinds of events. Trust me he will get plenty of use out of it throughout the next few years."

Natalia conceded her point and they headed back up to the office. At Natalia's confused look Olivia pulled her into her office. "I didn't shut anything down and I don't want to have to come back later. Let me lock up for the day then we will head up."

With a nod Natalia went to her own office to do the same. When they were done they went up to the suite checked on Rafe then moved to the main bedroom and Olivia lay down. "I didn't realize until I lay here just how tired I was."

Natalia smiled and moved over to the other side and sat taking off her shoes. "I knew how tired I was before we went to lunch."

When she lay down Olivia rolled and pulled her close. "Why are you so tired, are you getting sick?"

Snuggling in she sighed. "No I just didn't sleep well last night."

"Why didn't you wake me, what kept you up?"

"I had a nightmare and couldn't fall back asleep. I didn't want to wake you so I just lay there until I fell back to sleep. It just took me a while to do so." She kept having these reoccurring nightmares about Olivia leaving her and taking Emma away from her, Rafe choosing to go with her too. Or others where Olivia collapsed and they didn't get her help in time or if they did the doctors could do nothing. She'd wake terrified and usually all it took was snuggling back up to Olivia to put her back to sleep, just her presence was enough to soothe her. Last night though the dream was so intense it took her longer to calm down.

Olivia tightened her arms. "You should have woken me, I could have helped maybe."

"I knew today was going to be a long day and even longer night and I didn't want to keep you from your sleep. I'm ok, I just need a nap." She yawned burrowing in.

Olivia shook her head not liking that she didn't wake her but said no more. Reaching over she set the alarm then snuggled in and they fell asleep almost instantly.

An few hours later Olivia woke to Natalia trembling, holding on to her almost painfully. She turned toward her slightly and started running her hands up and down her arm and back. "Natalia… Wake up… You're ok honey wake up."

She shook her gently and Natalia bolt up in the bed looking around franticly. "OLIVIA!"

Olivia sat up quickly and took her by the arms turning her to look at her. "Hey, I'm right here, it's ok."

Natalia finally focused on her as she looked up into her eyes then sobbed falling into her. Olivia just pulled her closer as she held on to her for dear life crying and she kept whispering into her ear that she was ok, they were all ok. Eventually Natalia calmed and moved to sit up but Olivia held tight.

Sighing she melted back into her. "I'm sorry I think I soaked your shirt."

Olivia shook her head kissing her temple. "Don't worry about that. Are you ok now? What was that one about?"

Natalia burrowed in closer and buried her face in Olivia's neck. "I don't even want to think about it?"

Olivia sighed. "Come on Talia, it might help to talk about it. Is it the same one you were having a few weeks ago about Rafe? Please sweetie, let me help."

"No, I haven't had that one about Rafe since you brought him home. We… we were sitting on the porch swing drinking cocoa before bed and you… you collapsed like before at company only…only this time we didn't have one of those portable defibrillators and the ambulance was too late…"

She got choked up again and Olivia tightened her arms. "Hey, you know that that's not going to happen. We have one of those things at home, in the office, up here in the nightstand, in the lobby with the first aid kit, and in both our cars. You even made sure they had one down with the car attendant that is put in any of the company cars that I check out and take anywhere. We're covered."

Taking a calming breath she just sat and breathed in Olivia's scent feeling her pulse against her nose calming her. "I know… I know we do but I can't help it. I worry about you so much."

"How long have you had this nightmare? Is this what kept you awake last night?"

Natalia nodded into her neck. "Last night was worse though because after everything happened with you Alan came and took Emma from me too. Then Rafe left to live with them to keep her safe and I lost all of you. That is one of the ones I have the most but there are others. I just… I need my family and in my dreams I always lose you all one way or another."

Olivia kissed her forehead and pulled her face up to look in her eyes. "You aren't going to lose us. I know my heart problems scare you but I'm not going anywhere without a fight. I need our family too." Taking a breath she looked deep into Natalia's eyes. "But… If something does happen with my health and I don't make it home to you…"

Natalia shook her head violently. "No… You can't say things like that, NO!"

"Hey stop and just listen please." She wiped the tears falling from Natalia's eyes as she sighed, resigned to having to hear this. "If that happens you need to get my last request papers out of my office safe. In there are papers that say that you become Emma's legal guardian. She is to stay with you. If something happens to the both of us Ava and Rafe will have joint guardianship. There are other papers that tell how to split up all my assets between you and the kids along with my wishes for what you need to do with the Beacon. Mel also has all of those papers as well."

Natalia just stared at her. "Emma… The Beacon… Assets… What did you do Liv?"

Olivia shrugged. "I made sure that my family was taken care of if something happened to me. I want no one but you taking care of Emma if I'm not there. I also split everything I have up between you and the kids, including the Beacon so that you can continue to take care of them. I needed to know, for my peace of mind, that you are all taken care of."

"Olivia…"

She cut of her protest before it could be voiced. "No, I need to know that you are all ok. Just… It's already done and I will not change it. Unless you don't want Emma…"

Placing her hand over Olivia's mouth she cut her off. "Of course I want Emma, don't you dare ever think otherwise. She's my baby."

Olivia sighed and let that tiny bit of panic that crept in leave her once more. "Well that's what I thought, I just had to ask, sorry. So please just let that go and know that nothing and no one will ever take her away from you. As far as my health... all I can do is promise you that I will take care of myself and listen to you and the doctors so that I can be here for as long as I possibly can. "

Natalia nodded and fell back into her. "Ok, I'm sorry I just…"

Olivia just held her close. "I know, I understand. Stop apologizing, just try to think on the positive side and stay calm. There is no sense in you keeping yourself awake and stressed about something that we have no control over. All we can do is the best we can and take a page out of your own book and pray that I stay ok for as long as possible."

She smiled as she felt Natalia's muscles finally release most of the tension that had been holding them since before she woke. Natalia sighed and kissed her neck softly. "Ok, ok, I'll do my best to try and calm down."

Olivia shifted to lean against the headboard pulling Natalia with her. "You know what I think we need?" Natalia settled back into her and shook her head. "I think with spring break coming up in a few weeks that we need to pack up the kids and a suitcase or two and head to California to see Ava. I think we've all been under a little bit too much stress, especially in the last few weeks and we need a vacation."

Natalia sat up and beamed at her then frowned. "What about Rafe, he just started his job here?"

Olivia shrugged. "He can take a week off after these last two events. Greg is taking next week off starting tomorrow then he will be back for a week before we head out and he can hold the fort. Rafe can go with us because I said so. I don't want to go on vacation and leave him home unless he doesn't want to go with us."

Natalia smiled and rested back against her. "Ok, that sounds nice I can't wait to see Ava again. I miss her so much so I know you are missing her like crazy."

Before anymore can be said they turn to the door as it opens and Rafe sticks his head in. Olivia waves him forward as Natalia sits up a bit. "Hey, I was just about to start getting ready for tonight so I can go pick up Ashley and get back. I was checking to make sure you guys were up from your nap."

Olivia smiled and motioned for him to sit next to them. "Well as you can see we are up. We were just about to get up and around ourselves."

He smiled and looked to Natalia getting a good look at her face. "What's wrong ma, you've been crying?"

She sniffled again and wiped her face. "I'm ok, I promise mijo I just had a bad dream and woke up a little emotional."

He looked to Olivia who nodded in confirmation then back to Natalia. "Anything you want to talk about?"

Shaking her head she took his hand and laid her head on Olivia's shoulder. "No, Olivia talked me out of it and I'm ok, but thank you."

He nodded and smiled leaning forward to kiss her cheek then Olivia's. "Ok, I'm sure she took good care of you so I'm going to go ahead and get ready for tonight. The tailor just finished up with the alterations to my suit about thirty minutes ago so it's ready for me. I'll see you either before I leave or when I get back from getting Ashley."

Natalia squeezed his hand once more as he moved to leave. "Ok mijo. We'll see you in a bit."

He smiled and left the room as Olivia moved off the bed and pulled Natalia with her. Once they were standing she brought her into her arms and held her close. "Ok, how about you go on to Emma's room and take your shower and started getting ready while I do the same in here."

Sighing into her Natalia tightened her arms for a moment more then stepped back. "That sounds good and thank you for before."

"Anytime," she said as she kissed her temple and moved toward the bathroom.

Natalia watched her go until she closed the door then smiling made her way to Emma's room to get ready for the evening herself.

 **A/N: Ok my lovelies that was a long one just for you. Up next the ball and things come to a head.**


	13. Chapter 13

**Title: Can I Say I love You**

 **Summary: After My Two Mommies and Natalia leaving after setting Ms. Jennings straight to go out with Frank. Natalia tries to figure out what she is feeling. Will she continue to run to Frank or will she own up to what she is feeling? Will Olivia? Or will they keep pushing their hearts away?** **  
** **Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and I do not make any profit from this.**

 **Chapter 13**

Tonight was sure to be an interesting night. Olivia had told her all about the ball and the little dramas that always happened during it. This would be the third year that it was held in the Beacon Ballroom and Olivia was proud that she had won that account and that they continued to use them.

The night was all about charity and anyone who was anyone would be in attendance, all the social elite. To say she was nervous would have been a huge understatement of epic proportions. Not only was she to work this thing she was to be Olivia's right arm through it. It was one thing in the boardroom or working with the staff but this was different. She didn't know how to schmooze with the big wigs.

She picked up her phone as it alerted her to a text and sighed seeing it was from the head chef. Taking one last look in the mirror to make sure she was ready she grabbed her clutch and headed toward the kitchen. Olivia had left about 15 minutes ago to take care of something in the ballroom and had just knocked and told her through the door that she would see her down there.

After talking the chef down off a cliff she helped him fix his current problem and was off again headed to the ballroom. As it was she was now running late and after texting Olivia she knew that people had already started to arrive and they were about to get things started. She ran to the bathroom and checked herself one last time and made her way to find Olivia.

She was heading to the elevator to get to one of the staff entrances when Rafe stopped her. "Ma what are you doing, you should be in there already?"

Natalia sighed. "I know but there was a problem in the kitchen and Chef Michelson was having a meltdown. Everything is fine now so I'm headed to find Olivia."

She turned to push the button for the elevator but he pulled her along with him. "You were supposed to be announced with Olivia but she's already in there."

When she saw that he was pulling her to the guest entrance she started to panic. "I can't go in that door alone."

"You have to Ma, Liv is waiting for you to come down so she knows where you are the second you get in the ballroom. She's hovering around the bottom of the stairs. People are already asking for you and Liv is getting antsy so you need to go."

Natalia sighed and allowed herself to me drug along.

In the ballroom Olivia was once again looking toward the stairs. She didn't know why she was so nervous or why she was so upset that they didn't get to arrive together. She just really wanted to do this with Natalia. Hell she needed to stop lying to herself and just admit that she was in love with her best friend and wanted to enter the ball with her as her date not just her co-worker and she didn't even get to do that.

She sighed and looked up again. "I see you are missing your partner in crime."

She turned to see the Governor and his wife beside her. She smiled and took his hand. "I was just waiting for her actually. We were separated before everything started by two different problems that needed our attention. She should be here any minute."

Helen smiled looking around. "I must say Olivia, you and your staff have really out done yourselves this year. This has got to be the prettiest one I have ever attended. It looks like a fairytale."

"That's the idea Helen. We almost required old style dress but the charity committee didn't like the idea."

Helen frowned slightly. "Oh that would have been wonderful if you ask me. Maybe when you host the Masquerade ball in October you can do it then."

Olivia smiled leaning in close. "Don't tell but that is what we are planning. A full out Victorian Masquerade Ball complete with old style dominos."

Helen clapped excitedly. "Oh that will be so much fun. I must start looking for my outfit very soon."

Olivia chuckled and opened her mouth to reply but was stopped by the announcer on the stairs. "Next Ladies and Gentleman we have Beacons very own Natalia Rivera."

Applause rose as she whipped back around to see Natalia descending the stairs and her breath caught in her throat. Natalia was wearing a light purple strapless gown with a sweetheart neckline that synched at the waist and flowed freely around her hips and legs. She didn't say anymore to the Governor and his wife as she moved away to intercept her at the bottom of the stairs.

Helen giggled and wrapped her arm through her husbands. "I remember when we were young and you used to look at me that way."

He pulled her close and kissed her softly. "I still do my dear," and they turned to watch as Natalia gave her hand to Olivia.

The moment she saw Olivia coming toward the stairs she almost tripped as she tried to control her heart. Olivia was breathtaking in a dark purple gown that flowed around her legs and draped snuggly around her hips and upper body cutting over one shoulder leaving the other and most of her back bare. When she finally made it down the stairs she wasn't sure she was breathing.

Olivia took her hand kissing it softly. "My god Natalia… I have no words to describe how beautiful you look. I love you in purple."

Natalia blushed. "You're stunning in purple yourself Liv."

Olivia just smiled drawing her closer and treaded Natalia's hand threw her arm and guided her away from the stairs so the next guests could be announced. They stopped back where Olivia had been talking to the Governor. "I must say ladies are both a vison tonight." He said taking both of their hands and kissing them.

Helen smiled brightly, "I love how you coordinated your dresses in light and dark. Even the styles complement each other."

Olivia shook her head. "I wish we could take credit for that but we shopped separately for the ball. This is the first we are seeing each other's gowns."

"Great minds I suppose. Now, come along dear. I would like a glass of champagne and we need to leave these lovely ladies to themselves to mingle and hopefully not work too much. But do find us later dears. If it's ok with you I'd like to see if Olivia dances as superbly as it looked like at the wedding."

Olivia blushed and Natalia chuckled. "Of course, we'll see you later."

They waved and were off and Olivia looked to Natalia like she was crazy. "You could have said I was awful and told her to save her toes or something. Now I have to dance with her."

Laughing she nudges her to start walking. "Oh stop, you will be just fine. I promise to dance with you myself to make it up to you."

Olivia pouts and bats her eyes. "Don't I get more than one?"

This just caused Natalia to laugh harder and shake her head amusedly. "I suppose I could save you a few as long as you behave tonight."

Now it was Olivia's turn to laugh. "You ask a lot of me Talia but I shall do my best."

Still laughing they moved into the throng of guests to mingle. When it was time everyone was called to take their seats and dinner was served.

They were sitting with the Governor, his wife, Doris and some guy Olivia had never met, and the Chief of police and his wife. Natalia was feeling very out of place but tried her best to keep up with the conversation. Anytime she started to feel overwhelmed somehow Olivia seemed to know it and would place a hand on her leg, arm or back calming her instantly.

Once dinner was done everyone was off to mingle, write checks and just enjoy the ball. They had seen Rafe and Ashley a few times throughout the night and they seemed to be having fun as well. They were now just standing off to the side of the dance floor talking when Doris came up to them with her date in tow. "I see we are having fun this evening."

Olivia scoffed looking to the bored looking man beside her, "Some of us more than others. How are you tonight D?"

She just shrugged and looked to the dance floor. "It's a nice ball, one of the best yet."

The melancholy in her tone stopped Olivia from teasing her about her date any further. "Yes, we're proud of it. Rafe and Greg out did themselves."

Doris gave her a grateful look and turned to Natalia, "How's Rafe doing now that he's home? He looked very handsome when he came to pick up Ashley."

Natalia smiled. "He's doing very well actually. He started working here last week unofficially then official this last weekend. We found a new church that he is very happy with too. He seems to be doing wonderfully."

She nodded with a smile. "I'm happy to hear it. Well, I have to go mingle a little more so I'll see you guys in a bit."

They waved her off and turned to see the Governor again. "I swear if I didn't know any better I'd think you two were following us." Olivia said with a chuckle.

Helen laughed and extended her hand. "I was promised a dance so I came to collect."

Olivia bows deeply with a smirk on her face, "As the lady commands."

Helen blushes in spite of herself and allows Olivia to guide her to the floor for a waltz. Natalia chuckles at her antics and watches them go.

"I must say that I've known Olivia a long time and I've never seen her as happy as I've seen her lately."

Natalia turned back to him with a smile. "Well, we've had a lot of good things happening lately. I'm happy to hear that."

They watch for a while more until Olivia guides her back. Before they get within hearing distance he leans in slightly. "She's lucky to have you, you know. I'm so happy for her that she has found you."

Natalia looks at him unsure of what he meant with that comment. "I do my best for her."

"It shows," he says as he's moving to intercept his wife and whisk her away.

Olivia is laughing as she moves back in beside her. "I swear that woman is crazy. I figured you would dance with her equally crazy husband."

She just shook her head. "He never asked and I was happy to wait here for you."

Olivia smiled but before she could say anymore they were interrupted. "Natalia, Olivia, how are you guys this evening? This place is so gorgeous this year."

They turn to smile at Blake but were not happy to see her on Franks arm. Olivia shifted slightly so that Natalia was just a hair behind her. "Thank you Blake, I'm glad you like it. I didn't think you were coming this year."

Blake smiled and tightened her arms around Franks. "Oh I wasn't but Frank had an extra ticket and you know I couldn't turn down the party of the year."

Before she can reply Frank moved forward. "Natalia can we talk?"

They both shifted again putting Natalia further behind Olivia. "No Frank, I've said all I'm going to say to you."

He threw his hands up and scowls. "This is bullshit Natalia. You are not this way. You can't possibly be serious about Olivia."

Natalia put a hand on Olivia back as she growled. "I assure you I am dead serious. You need to leave us be."

Blake had been looking back and forth between them all confused. "What's going on guys?"

Frank looked to her irritated. "Natalia is pretending to be with Olivia for some unforeseen reason."

As his voice rose he was starting to attract attention and Doris was beside the girls in a heartbeat. "Detective, you were asked to keep your distance."

Frank just scoffed. "I didn't do anything but talk. Blake wanted to come and say hi so I brought her over."

He was still being too loud and the Governor came over as well flanking the other side of them. "Is there a problem here?"

Frank not knowing who the man was just kept going. "These two think their fooling everyone by pretending to be a couple."

The Governor just shook his head and Natalia step out from behind Olivia. "You have no right to come here and say these things. You already came to our home and I told you I wasn't interested in you. I have my family, Olivia, Rafe, Ava and Emma. You need to get a grip and leave us be."

Olivia smirked. "Besides we already showed you what we are."

Frank rounded on her. "Shut up, I don't know what you did to her but you need to stop."

Olivia shook her head and took a step forward. "All I have done is love her and help her take care of our family. You need to back off and take no for an answer."

Frank moved to get closer but Natalia pulled Olivia back into her. "She's right Frank. I have told you over and over that I don't want you. I told you that Olivia and our family are all I need. I've even shown you."

He shook his head. "That was just for show. You'd never do that where anyone else could see because it's a lie. You are just pretending."

Natalia threw her hands in the air. "Oh my god really? Is that what it's going to take?"

She spun Olivia around locking eyes for a moment then pulled her in for a searing kiss. Olivia groaned at the sudden heat of it and shifted wrapping her arms around Natalia leaving no air between them. Once again the second their lips connected everything around them disappeared and it was just them.

They were brought out of it abruptly by the yelling now happening in front of them. When they released each other slightly they saw Rafe standing in front of them and Doris's date was trying to hold Frank back. At that moment Chief Wolfe came up behind him putting a hand on his shoulder to try and calm him but it caused him to turn around and punch him instead.

Everything stopped for a moment then some of the other cops that were in attendance were now close enough and were cuffing Frank. Doris rushed to her cousin and checked his face. Once Frank was away Olivia and Natalia came over as well. "Are you ok Dennis?" Doris asked looking him over.

He just swats her hands away. "Yes Doris I'm fine."

Natalia came forward and sighed. "I think you need an ice pack." She catches one of the staffs eye and they ran off to get one.

"I'm fine really. Do you want to press charges?" He allowed his wife to look him over while he looked at them.

Natalia nodded. "Yes, you know the trouble we were having before. He was completely out of line yet again."

He moved to grab his cell phone and Olivia stepped up. "Can it wait until after the ball? Maybe we can give our statements in the morning. I hate to have this ruin Valentine's Day for everyone."

He looked around and nodded. "That will be fine if everyone that saw what happened will agree to give a statement on the way out tonight or come in to the station before noon tomorrow." Everyone gave their agreement and he conceded that it was ok.

The waiter came back and handed the icepack to his wife and she sat him down and put it to his eye. She looked to Olivia and sighed. "He's going to have a black eye tomorrow but he'll be fine. Everyone just needs to continue on with the ball. I know I will once he's done with this ice."

Everyone around them chuckled and Olivia motioned for the music to start back up then looked to Natalia who was now talking to Rafe. "Thank you for not hitting him mijo."

Rafe just shrugged. "I was just waiting to see if I had a reason to. If he had broken free of that other guy I would have to keep him away from you and it would have been self-defense."

Olivia put her hand on his shoulder and squeezed lightly. "Yes but you used your head and waited to see whether it was necessary or not. We're proud of you son, a year ago you would have hit first and the consequences be damned."

"I just got home. I'd like to stay there for a long time to come." He smiled and looked them both over. "You guys ok?"

Natalia kissed his cheek. "Yes we are so go find Ashley and enjoy the rest of your night."

He nodded and kissed them both before turning to Ashley and heading back to the dance floor. Turning back to Natalia Olivia was apprehensive. "Um… I really think we need to talk."

Natalia nodded and took her hand but before they could walk away Blake stopped them. "I am so sorry. I had no idea when I asked to come talk to you that he would do something like that. The man's gone mental."

Olivia sighed just wanting to be alone with Natalia so they could talk. "It's not your fault Blake. Feel free to stay and enjoy yourself and if you need a ride home let us know and I'll have a Beacon car take you."

Doris stepped up and smiled. "I'll take her home. My date went to the station with Frank so we can just hang out together. That is if it's ok with you." She finished looking at Blake.

She just beamed and moved closer to her. "That is perfect." She turned back to Olivia with a little wave. "Have fun with the rest of your night," and she pulled Doris off behind her.

Olivia chuckled at the two then turned back to Natalia who had started walking briskly holding her hand. She moved through the room and out of one of the staff entrances and across the hall to a conference room closing the door behind them before she slowed down.

The moment the door was closed Olivia was pacing. "I'm sorry Natalia, I don't know what to do. Everyone is going to think that we are together now. I don'…"

"Stop," She was cut off by Natalia standing in front of her putting her hands on her shoulders. "I kissed you so you have nothing to apologize for. Just please calm down before you have your pacemaker alarm going off."

Olivia shook her head. "But they're all going to think…"

"I know what they're going to think and I don't care," she states cutting her off again.

Olivia just stands looking stunned and Natalia sighs. "We never finished our talk from when Frank showed up at the house. I was trying to tell you then that when I panicked after Emma presentation it was because it looked like you were upset by it and I couldn't afford for you to see right through me and lose you totally."

Olivia shook her head putting her hands on Natalia's waist. "What do you mean see right through you?"

Natalia sighed and rested her forehead against Olivia's shoulder. "I wasn't worried about what people would think. I didn't care if they thought we were together. I was worried that you cared and that it was upsetting you that people would think we were a couple. You were freaking out and it freaked me out."

"You don't care if they think we are together?" She asked pulling her face up to look into her eyes.

"No, they can think what they want. What I care about is what you think, what you want. I just… I… Olivia I care about you."

"I care about you too. You're my family." She rested their foreheads together and sighed. "I just want our family."

Natalia looked into her eyes. "What if I want more?"

Olivia looked like she's been slapped. "Well, then I wouldn't stand in the way of what you want."

She tried to back away but Natalia held firm. "No don't pull away, I meant I want more with you."

She stopped moving, she may have stopped breathing and she was afraid to move an inch. "What do you mean more?"

She just sighed stepping closer to eliminate the distance Olivia had created and spoke softly. "I want everything and if our last two kisses were anything to go by I think you want that too. I want you Olivia, I want there to be an us. Do you… want that too?"

Olivia smiled slightly. "What kind of us?"

Natalia smirked leaning in brushing their lips together. "Do _I_ need to hit _you_ over the head with this?" and with that she connected their lips once more.

 **A/N: Hello my lovelies, this was kind of a long one as an I'm sorry I've been gone so long. Hope you enjoyed it and more to come very soon.**


	14. Chapter 14

**Title: Can I Say I love You**

 **Summary: After My Two Mommies and Natalia leaving after setting Ms. Jennings straight to go out with Frank. Natalia tries to figure out what she is feeling. Will she continue to run to Frank or will she own up to what she is feeling? Will Olivia? Or will they keep pushing their hearts away?** **  
** **Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and I do not make any profit from this.**

 **Chapter 14**

 _She just sighed stepping closer to eliminate the distance Olivia had created and spoke softly. "I want everything and if our last two kisses were anything to go by I think you want that too. I want you Olivia, I want there to be an us. Do you… want that too?"_

 _Olivia smiled slightly. "What kind of us?"_

 _Natalia smirked leaning in brushing their lips together. "Do_ I _need to hit_ you _over the head with this?" and with that she connected their lips once more._

Olivia instantly wrapped her arms around her and pulled her flush against her. Natalia ran her arms up and around her neck trying to pull her impossibly closer as she ran her tongue along the seam of Olivia's mouth being granted immediate entrance and they both moaned at finally tasting each other for the first time. Neither battled for dominance, it wasn't needed. They just savored each other.

When the need for air became impossible to ignore they pulled apart just slightly resting their foreheads together. Finally catching her breath Olivia pecked her lips sweetly. "Yes."

Natalia just smiled. "Yes what honey?"

"I want an us too. God do I want us." she tightened her arms and shifted holding her close. "I love you Natalia."

Natalia let out a small sob and pulled back just enough to crash her lips back into Olivia and kiss her like she'd never get the chance to kiss her again taking her breath away. When she pulled back they were they were both panting for air. "I love you too Olivia."

Olivia just pulled her back into the kiss. Eventually they slowed and just rested against each other until Olivia sighed. "I hate to say it but we really should go do some damage control. It is our party after all and we don't want to stay away too long."

Natalia reluctantly relaxed her arms and stepped back. "You're right but once we get back up to our suite I'm not letting you go."

Olivia chuckled lightly and pecked her lips. "I think I can agree to that."

Natalia joined her laughter and they both checked each other's make up and dress to make sure they were presentable to return to the ball. Once they made it back they noticed that they'd been gone about an hour and Rafe was instantly by their side.

"Is everything ok? One second you guys were there and the next I couldn't find you anywhere."

Doris walked up and laughed. "That's because your ma drug Olivia off out of the room after everything settled back down."

Natalia just smiled. "We just needed to have a word and freshen up."

Doris laughed harder and Rafe just looked confused. "I'll bet. By the way Olivia, you might want to check your lipstick again."

With that she cracked up as she walked away. Olivia immediately turned to Natalia who blushed slightly reaching up to clean up the small place they missed. Rafe just shook his head. "I'm going to go back to Ashley now. I swear the girl is never going to go out with me again between drama and work crap."

Olivia cupped his cheek to bring his face to look at her. "Drama happens in all families and I'm sure Ashley can understand that with her mother and she knew that you would be working part of the night so I think you should be good. If not she wasn't worth it to begin with."

Rachel sighed and leaned into her hand before kissing her cheek. "Thanks mom. Ok, I gotta go." He kissed Natalia quickly and was off.

Natalia turned and wrapped her arm around Olivia. "You are so good with him."

Olivia shrugged and put her arm around her shoulders. "He's my boy."

Natalia just melted and leaned up to kiss her lightly but could say no more. "You know, that's what got us all the drama earlier."

They turned and smiled at Helen and the Governor. "We're sorry that the evening was interrupted by our personal drama."

The Governor shook his head, "Nonsense. That was all on that oaf not you. He's just jealous that you have such a beauty on your arm."

Helen smiled and took Olivia's hand. "We were just looking for you to let you know that we were leaving. We reserved a room so we are going to retire for the night. We had a lovely evening."

Olivia smiled and bowed over her hand. "Thank you for coming and for that lovely dance."

Helen blushed and waved her off as they took their leave. Natalia just chuckled at her antics and pulled her back in. "I think I'm ready for one of _my_ dances."

Olivia turned smiling. "It would be my pleasure my dear."

She guided her to the floor as they talked and waited for the next song. Olivia laughed as the mambo came on and she held out a hand to her. "Well Ms. Rivera, do you think you can keep up?"

Natalia smirked and took her hand, "Oh no Ms. Spencer, the question is, can you?"

They both laughed and took the floor. Doris and Blake stood back and watched as they dominated the floor. The rest of the dancers cleared giving them room and it was breathtaking watching them glide effortlessly totally lost in each other.

Blake sighed, "I would give anything to have someone look at me like that."

Doris smiled sadly, "Me too. They do make a beautiful couple don't they. I don't see how anyone could think that that is fake. Frank's a dumbass."

Blake scoffed, "Frank is just blind to anything that doesn't fit into what he wants."

Doris smirked. "You're the one that accepted a date with him."

Blake rolled her eyes. "Of course I did. I couldn't miss this ball for anything if I had the chance to go even if it was on Frank's arm for a moment. Look at me now. I'm with you drinking and having a blast. We should do this more often. I always forget how much fun you can be when you loosen up."

"We may just have to do that." She said as they looked back out to see the dance winding down."

As they came to a stop they were slightly breathless and startled at the roar of applause that greeted them. Once again Natalia was blushing as Olivia guided her off the floor. "Where did you lean to dance like that Talia? I almost couldn't keep up with you and I was leading."

Natalia chuckled and intertwined their arms. "Mi Abuela was a ballroom dancer when she was young. When she got older she had her own studio and taught me. I could do just about every ballroom dance there is by the time I was 12. How about you? The mambo is not a normal dance to know."

Olivia shrugged. "When I lived on San Cristobel I was engaged to a prince and it was required that I learn all the dances. It was one of the most useful things I learned in that castle."

They both laughed and moved off to mingle a little more. The night was coming to an end and they hadn't released the hold they had on each other since the incident. They didn't care either they just needed the contact since they were forced to be in the middle of things until the ball was over. Once the guest started to leave they spoke to one of the police officers that were stationed around the exits taking statement then they moved off to find Rafe and Greg finding them giving last minute instructions to the cleanup crew.

Olivia smiled watching Rafe work then called him over. "Hey bud, you don't have to stay until it's all cleaned up. That's what the cleaning crew is for. Take Ashley home and get some rest. You earned it."

He looked over to where Ashley was talking with her mom and Blake and smiled. "I will. I'm going to take her home, check in one more time then head on up. Are we going to church in the morning?"

Natalia nodded. "Yes mijo, I'm picking up Emma from Judy's parents and I want to officially join the church for our family."

He smiled and kissed her cheek. "Cool, I'll be ready." With that he kissed Olivia as well and was off.

Olivia turned to Natalia. "You ready to go up?"

Natalia smiled intertwining their arms together, "More than."

They made their way to the elevator exchanging pleasantries with a few straggling guest and finally made it to their suite. Neither spoke as they went to separate rooms to change out of their gowns. When Natalia knocked on the door to their room she only entering after Olivia called her in. Olivia was already settled under the covers and Natalia happily made her way across the room and climbed in on her side.

As she settled against Olivia she smiled and kissed her neck. "Tonight was a huge success for the most part don't you think?"

Olivia chuckled pulling her closer. "Except for the whole Frank drama and being outed to the general public, yeah, I'd say it was a good night."

Natalia leaned up and propped herself to look down at her. "Are you telling me that you would change what happened? Are you ashamed of my kis…"

She was cut off when Olivia pulled her down and kissed her softly before pulling back. "I am not now nor will I ever be ashamed of kissing you anywhere. I just meant that it wasn't exactly the ideal way for us to come out as being together. Especially when until after everything went down we weren't actually a couple."

Natalia shook her head and smiled. "If you want to keep telling yourself that…"

Olivia looked up confused. "Um… what do you mean?"

Natalia kissed her nose chastely. "Please baby, we've been a couple for weeks, maybe months. We just didn't admit it to ourselves or each other." At Olivia's puzzled look she elaborated. "Emma saw it first. Then the governor and Doris. Then Rafe. Olivia he calls you mom and Emma calls me ma. We have been sleeping together for weeks and dropped all pretense of it being for any other reason than we just wanted to a long time ago. We have kissed each other four times now to make a point to each other or someone else and once for like an hour because we finally pulled our heads out of the sand."

Olivia just lay there shocked thinking about everything she had just said and it dawned on her that Natalia was right. She went over every interaction with the governor and Helen. With Doris and the kids, even with Judy's mom and the priest at the church and she conceded that they had been acting like they were together. Whether it be by accident or design they have been dating for a very long time.

Natalia chuckled as realization lit her face, "See?"

Olivia looked up at her and smirked. "How long have you realized this?"

"I knew my own feelings the whole time and started to suspect yours after Em's presentation but the rest I didn't figure out until tonight while I was yelling at Frank and no one was agreeing with him. The governor and Doris actually laughed at him when he said we were fake. That's when I decided to just shut him up and kiss you. I needed that boost to talk to you after and tell you how I felt. Are you upset with me for kissing you in front of everyone?"

Olivia shook her head "No honey, I'm glad you did. It made us finally come clean with each other. You can kiss me anytime and anywhere you want."

Natalia smiled leaning in, "Well in that case…" and she connected their lips in a kiss that was far from chaste.

Olivia moaned into her as she opened her mouth and Natalia's tongue invaded tangling with her own. She pulled her closer shifting until Natalia was practically fully on top of her.

Natalia moaned as she felt the full body contact allowing her to shift them. She let her leg fall between Olivia and almost came unglued at the loud moan that Olivia graced her with as her thigh accidental pressed into her center. She pulled away from the kiss shifting slightly away from her body. "I'm sorry Liv, I didn't mean to do that. I'm not rea…"

Olivia shook her head pulling her back against her. "It's ok, I'm not either but I love the feel of you against me. Please don't back away from me. We'll take things as slow as you want I just need you close.

Natalia settled back into her but was careful of where her leg rested. "I need you close too love," and she moved back in reconnecting them. This time though it was slow and sensual instead of fast and demanding.

Time disappeared for them and they had no idea how long they lay there just languidly exploring each other's mouths. Eventually they completely slowed and Natalia was once again lying in her spot upon Olivia's chest and they were almost asleep. No words had been needed as they just snuggled into one another, content.

On a sigh Olivia pulled her impossibly closer. "I love you Natalia."

Natalia groggily kissed her neck and burrowed in. "I love you too Olivia, so much."

With that they both contentedly closed their eyes and let sleep take them.

 **A/N: Sorry for the delay but here it is.**


	15. Chapter 15

**Title: Can I Say I love You**

 **Pairing: Olivia/Natalia** **  
** **Rating: NC-17** **  
** **Summary: After My Two Mommies and Natalia leaving after setting Ms. Jennings straight to go out with Frank. Natalia tries to figure out what she is feeling. Will she continue to run to Frank or will she own up to what she is feeling? Will Olivia? Or will they keep pushing their hearts away?** **  
** **Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and I do not make any profit from this.**

 **Chapter 15**

Olivia smiled as she woke feeling Natalia nestled into her chest. It was a rare morning that she awoke first and she loved it when she did. It gave her the perfect opportunity to observe the amazing woman in her arms uninterrupted. Kissing her head lovingly she settled back to watch her for a moment just thinking. She couldn't believe all that had happened the night before. It was already turning into the perfect night from the start but after Frank caused a scene and Natalia kissed her it turned into one of the best nights of her life. She and Natalia finally told each other how they felt and they were now officially a couple. Although from the sounds of things everyone around them already thought they were.

Olivia liked to think that she was an observant person and pretty intelligent but she really did have to be hit over the head with it for it to become clear. After the blow up with the My Two Mommies report and Natalia running to Frank she was too afraid to think that they could be more then friends and she wouldn't let herself see what was glaringly obvious to everyone else around them. It didn't matter now because it was all out in the open for all to see and she was thrilled.

She looked down again as Natalia started to stir and kissed her lips lightly. Natalia smiled and opened her eyes looking up at her. "Good morning sweetheart." She leaned up and kissed her lips lightly. "Did you sleep well?"

Olivia kissed her again already addicted to those lips, "Of course. You were in my arms so I slept wonderfully."

Natalia stretched rolling to the side. "What's the plan for the day love?"

Rolling with her she rested into her side looking down at her. "There are no plans for today. After the party last night I figured we could all use a day off. Rafe has plans with some friends and said not to expect him home until late tonight. Emma is staying at Jody's again tonight and won't be home until after school tomorrow so we are free to do whatever."

"Mmm, a day to just lounge around with you. What ever will we do?" Natalia pulled her down into a searing kiss and didn't let up until the need for air became present.

Olivia rested their foreheads together to catch her breath. "I would love to take you out on a date and was hoping you would you allow me that honor?"

Natalia smiled brightly. "Yes of course. What are we doing? Where are we going?"

Laughing at her excitement Olivia sat up and scooted off the bed heading for the bathroom. "That my dear is a surprise. Just dress casual for now."

With a wink she grabbed her phone and sauntered into the bathroom adding an extra sway in her step. Once she was behind closed doors Natalia squealed excitedly into her pillow and shot up off the bed heading to the shower in Emma's room.

In the bathroom Olivia made a phone call and fired off a bunch of texts to set up the things she wanted for the day and evening then quickly showered and readied herself. She came out of the room fully dressed with all of her plans in motion to find Natalia sitting on the couch waiting for her.

Natalia looked up smiling and met her halfway wrapping her arms around Olivia's neck and kissed her softly. "I hope this plan of yours involves breakfast because I am starving."

Olivia chuckled grabbing her hand and her purse. "It does actually. We are going to head down and have breakfast here then we will be off for a fun day together."

Smiling she followed her out of the room and they headed downstairs. Olivia guided her out to one of their private outdoor dining areas and pulled out a seat for her. "I hope this is ok? I didn't feel like sharing you today."

Natalia looked around at the beautiful flowers and the wonderful breakfast that lay before her. "This is perfect Liv."

She sat and Olivia kissed the top of her head before sitting as well. They ate and talked like always about this and that. Olivia had wondered if things would feel different today but they really didn't. It was just them and she realized that what Natalia said the night before was true. They had been together for months and just didn't define it or even realize it for a long time. This thought just made her smile brighter as they finished their food and headed out for what Olivia had planned.

As they walked through the lobby they were stopped by a voice behind them. "Olivia, Natalia."

Turning they see Helen and the Governor and they smiled. Olivia pulled them to a stop leaning into Natalia. "Good morning Helen, Governor."

Andrew smiled shaking his head, "Now Olivia. I think we are past formalities at this point. Call me Andrew."

She nodded and Natalia took the hand Helen offered her. "We were just heading out to go to the police station and give our statement then we are heading back to the city. Andy has to get back to work tomorrow. How about you two? Have you been yet?"

Natalia shook her head. "No, we talked to them last night and they said they would call if they needed anything more from us. We were actually on our way out. Olivia has planned some secretive day for me that I am really excited about."

Helen put a hand to her heart. "Oh that is so nice. We won't keep you we just wanted to say goodbye and thank you for a wonderful evening. Maybe if you two make it to the city you'll give us a call and we can have lunch or something?"

Olivia smiled. "I'm glad you had a good time last night even if it was disturbed with drama. We'll actually be in Chicago in a few months. We're just now in the first stages of talking with a hotel there about buying them out. We'll give you a call and make plans when it gets closer to time."

"You don't worry a thing about the drama. It keeps us all young and I'll await your call. You two have a lovely day and we'll see you later." Helen hugged them both.

Andrew shook hands with Olivia. "I'll give you a call later about the prison reform act I am planning. I think I will take you up on your offer for the ball room."

Olivia nodded, "Of course. Just let me know when so we can book it for you. Let us know if we can do anything more to help."

They all said their goodbyes after that and Olivia rushed Natalia out of the hotel and to her car as quickly as possible. Natalia laughed getting in the car. "What was the rush for?"

Olivia shrugged with a smile. "I wasn't getting caught by another person. I want to have a day with you and not have to discuss business or the idiot that is Frank today."

"Ok sweetie. Where are we headed now?" Natalia settled in as Olivia pulled out of the parking lot.

"Ah ah ah, that's a surprise. You'll find out when we get there."

Natalia huffed playfully then turned on the radio and they sang along as Olivia drove. A little while later Olivia pulled into a lot and Natalia's eyes grew into saucers looking out the window. "Oh my god you brought me to the carnival? It's only 11. I didn't think these things opened that early."

Olivia chuckled at her excitement. "Well I remembered you saying that you've never gotten to go to a carnival before when Emma and Jody were talking about going this weekend so I decided to bring you. They open the rides at noon but the rest of it opens at 10. This carnival has some animal attractions and shows and things other than the rides so it should be fun."

Natalia looked at her concerned. "You can't ride the rides Olivia."

"I can ride a few like the carousel, the Farris wheel, Spook house and the tunnel of love. The real fun here is the games and the little side shows." She looked at Natalia apprehensively. "I mean… If you want to do something else we can. I know I can't get on all of the fun rides bu…"

She was cut off by Natalia's lips. "I don't want to leave. I'm so excited to see everything I just didn't want you to try and do something you shouldn't. I don't care about riding rides accept for this tunnel of love you were talking about." She smirked and nipped at her bottom lip. "Come on, take me to the carnival."

Olivia smiled pecking her lips once more and they got out meeting at the hood of the car and held hands as they made their way to the entrance.

Once they were in Olivia bought a bunch of tickets and they headed off down the midway. They played all of the games they came to not really winning anything until they came to a shooting game where Olivia won Natalia an oversized monkey that was almost as big as she was. A little while later they found a basketball game that Natalia won Olivia a giant heart at.

They stayed close together all day and saw all the little shows they came across and rode the few things Olivia could ride. Natalia didn't like all of the greasy foods but Olivia talked her into them because it was tradition and you couldn't go to the carnival and not eat the cotton candy, corndogs and other fatty things. After promising a light dinner of salad and some kind of grilled chicken or fish she agreed and they gorged themselves on junk.

All in all the day was a success and when it was about 5:00 they headed out to the car. "That was so much fun Liv. Thank you so much for such an amazing day."

Olivia smiled getting in the car. "That was just the start angel. There's more of our date day to be had."

Natalia's jaw dropped. "More? Baby we don't have to cram it all into one day. I promise I'm not going anywhere and we have plenty of opportunity for more dates."

Olivia just shrugged. "I know but I just wanted to day to be special. Usually we have Emma and now Rafe is around more. Don't get me wrong I love our children and spending time with them but I feel like we've been dragging our feet with each other for so long and I just want a special day." With a sigh she turned to her fully and looked into her eyes. "Today was about fun. Tonight is about romance. I want to take you out to dinner and dance with you to slow music and a few other things I have planned. Tomorrow things go back to normal and we have the kids with us all of the time and then we are headed off to California in a few weeks for family vacation to see our other kid and will have very little alone time for a while."

Leaning over Natalia kissed her sweetly. "Ok, where are you taking me?"

Olivia chuckled and shook her head. "Not telling you. When we get home you just need to dress in something elegant, like that red dress you bought and said you'd never have a place to where it and be ready to leave by 7:00. That should give us plenty of time to get ready."

Natalia smiled and sat back as Olivia pulled onto the road. She was excited about the night to come and couldn't wait for whatever Olivia had planned.

 **A/N: Up next dinner and a few other fun times.** **I am so sorry to have taken so very long to update this and all of my other stories and want to thank all of you that have stayed with me for the continued support and welcome any new comers to the story. Real Life tends so suck these days and my fairy took a really long Otalia hiatus (Bad Fairy). I hope that she sticks around for a while and I can get these stories finished. I also have a new one that my fairy is playing with too so hopefully good things to come.**


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